Sploid: Where awesome, wild, and breathtaking tech moments burst into view.
If David Lynch and William S. Burroughs collaborated on an assassin’s journey through a quivering desert city of spindly-legged Salvador Dali monsters and menacing Buñuel eyeballs, it would look and sound a lot like Tangiers, a Kickstarter-backed video game that is close to its goal of becoming an alternate reality. https://kotaku.com/the-creepiest-game-youve-never-heard-of-5972242 https://kotaku.com/this-surrealist-stealth-game-is-close-to-being-funded-1033356107
Astronomers in Spain have located the band of asteroids that was home to the massive chunk of rock that exploded over Russia in February. And they’ve discovered some very scary news: Another 20 huge chunks of those asteroids could soon slam into Earth. https://gizmodo.com/chelyabinsk-meteor-may-be-part-of-larger-pack-threateni-1039974316
A neurotic mutant Jew who can’t stop thinking about sex … is this another adventure of the X-Men or a year in the life of Woody Allen? It’s both! Why waste time with another gloomy boring chapter of the Wolverine franchise when you can just fire up the YouTube machine and imagine 90 minutes of…
Hollywood, please never stop making painful movies like Escape from L.A. and Speed. The world would be a better place if you did, yes, but we wouldn’t be able to laugh at your infinite ludicrousness. https://jalopnik.com/the-ten-fakest-movie-car-chases-ever-filmed-1041183590
It sure is hot in Kansas City this time of year. Maybe that’s why a drunken baseball fan climbed into the fountains way up in the outfield last night and had to be dragged out by security. The 25-year-old woman was arrested and admitted she had been drinking, which is obvious from the blue cocktail…
Andreas Goeldi is a German who just got an Android phone because his iPhone is going to get a “frosted” glass effect. The sign of the apocalypse when it comes to gadgets, he explains. The fact is that—except for Apple fanboys and fandroids—all phones are basically the same crap running the same apps. https://gizmodo.com/frosted-glass-effects-why-i-switched-to-android-after-1040746797
“I get slammed and overwhelmed by how negative the Internet can get,” says Zooey Deschanel about internet trolls, bullies and “judgmental shithead commenters.” Whether you like her or not, she’s completely right. That’s why you—the reader—can send any imbecile to limbo in Kinja. Or be sent to limbo yourself. Your choice. https://jezebel.com/zooey-deschanel-hates-judgmental-shithead-internet-comm-1039426361
No matter how pretty they’re now, every tattoo becomes an ugly mistake in three decades: deformed, dangling obscenely on loose wrinkly skin. The Chinese characters that these imbeciles got, however, were ugly mistakes from the very first minute. Their meaning is completely wrong. https://kotaku.com/why-you-shouldnt-get-chinese-script-tattoos-if-you-ca-1037896584
Scientists have created the tiniest painting ever, the Mona Lisa that you can see here. It’s only 30 microns—less than half the thickness of a human hair. If that’s hard to imagine, look at the comparison: If this microscopic Gioconda were a tattoo on an ant, it would only take a minuscule fraction of its…
If you don’t plan your vacation now, you might never get one at all! It’s bad enough that so few American workers have paid time off and that so many people lack the money to go anywhere. Now even the lucky few with paid vacation time have to fight other co-workers for a chance to…
You’ll never guess which celebrity entertainer took part in a mysterious pagan ritual on a remote Caribbean island. With her bizarre feathered bikini and majestic white wings, this famous name might as well start having people sacrificed for Her amusement. https://jezebel.com/rihannas-at-a-carnival-in-barbados-with-a-flask-and-be-1032296934
Zoos began as amusements for humans, and decades of more recent noble goals such as conservation and captive breeding of endangered species has done little to change the basic dynamic of humans paying money to gawk at wild animals cruelly kept in cages. What brave country has finally ended this barbarism? [Photo via Getty Images.]…
Rosehip soup, goose sauced with mulberries, honeyed chicken handpies, turnip greens and sweetgrass salad… even greywater watch frog stew. These recipes from Game of Thrones—the popular TV series set in a fantasy medieval-ish world—actually look quite delicious. https://groupthink.kinja.com/a-game-of-thrones-food-blog-1021656599
What’s incredibly gross and the size of a bus? Here’s a hint: London’s sewer workers discovered the giant blob under the city, after masses of Londoners reported they could no longer flush their own human excrement down their toilets. [Photo of London sewer worker via Getty Images.] https://jalopnik.com/bus-sized-lump-of-fat-called-a-fatburg-discovered-i-1028805797
Pro sports hasn’t been the same since players learned the benefits of taking drugs that turn them into actual Supermen. It’s almost impossible to play baseball or any pro sport at the level fans expect without doping up on these performance-enhancing laboratory inventions. See which half-dozen new names are on the guilty list. https://deadspin.com/the-full-list-of-suspended-biogenesis-clients-1029648603
Industrial meat production is barbaric and disgusting—and don’t forget that belches and farts from stockyard corn-fed animals produce more greenhouse gases than automobiles. So the race is on to produce gross meat products without the beasts themselves. Has a breakthrough finally arrived? [Photo of vegetarian protesters via Getty Images.] https://jezebel.com/the-in-vitro-burger-is-here-and-it-tastes-like-a-prote-1027472269
Gadgets don’t get much better than this real life Wall-E robot. It’s as expressive as its screen counterpart. https://gizmodo.com/wall-e-recreated-as-an-amazing-real-life-bot-1028097268
The world’s most popular cartoon in the world and the world’s most popular toy are finally colliding, resulting in official Lego Simpsons sets coming in 2014. Fans are ecstatic on both camps—except the usual prudes, who are protesting because The Simpsons, they say, are not adequate for Lego. Idiots. https://gizmodo.com/doh-official-lego-simpsons-set-coming-in-2014-1027329546
The next Man of Steel movie will star Batman kicking Superman’s ass. Here are the actors rumored to be in the short list to play Gotham’s dark knight: Ryan Gosling, Max Martini, Josh Brolin, Joe Manganiello, Richard Armitage and Matthew Goode. Who would you like him to be? My vote: Josh Brolin. https://gizmodo.com/which-big-stars-are-in-the-running-to-play-batman-in-ma-1025591188
If you are so ravenous that you need to stuff your face with even bigger Chipotle burritos and burrito bowls—which are already massive to begin with—here you will find the tricks you need. https://lifehacker.com/hack-the-chipotle-burrito-bowl-for-more-meat-by-orderin-1006571055
