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The Most Over-Engineered Flask Known To Man

Finding ways to stealthily transport alcohol has been a long-time obsession for man. We've used just about anything imaginable to do so, too, including fruit and animal bladders. Around the 18th century, though, we found a more refined and possibly more sanitary way to do so with the hip flask, which, at the time, was mostly used by the privileged class. So it should come as no surprise that The Macallan and Oakley's recent collaboration has amounted to the most over-engineered and expensive mass-produced flask known to man.

You might think that's really dumb, but it's actually really awesome.

The aptly named The Flask is a ~$900 (£600), well, flask that was born from Oakley's Advance Product Development Team, which basically comes up with anything that might be considered "cutting edge" or unconventional for the sporting equipment purveyor. This specific division of the design team also works on things like Oakley's "standard issue" series of gear, which the US military often uses.


So how did Oakley come up with the "world's most badass flask?" As Neil Ferrier, the lead engineer for this project told me, it was over a dram of whisky, of course.


He added: "We warned Macallan that we weren't going to do safe. It's going to be polarizing. Not everyone is going to love it. Some people are really going to love it. Some people won't, but we're going to throw convention out the window when it comes to a regular flask. We're going to thoroughly, thoroughly design it and it will become the benchmark for flasks."

Using a rapid prototyping machine, Ferrier says they went through multiple iterations of the flask before it became the Flask, like the ones below.

Illustration for article titled The Most Over-Engineered Flask Known To Man
Illustration for article titled The Most Over-Engineered Flask Known To Man

Made from food-grade stainless steel, laser-welded, and put through a "pickling" process, both the inside and outside of the bare Flask leave it completely polished and clean. Other little quirks include a spring-loaded cap that's never going to get in your way when you're pouring one out. There's also a screw-in funnel with a tiny vent that Ferrier says was just another little "geek out" that the team came up with to create this monstrosity. It took them over 19 prototypes to get it just right.


An extremely limited edition, the Flask has been paired with a bottle of oak-aged 22-year-old The Macallan that was aged in an American oak cask, which was made in Spain and seasoned with sherry wine. It's surprisingly creamy and peppery on the palate, like a party in your mouth. But why does it cost soooo much? This particular Macallan was limited to only 400 bottles and thus only 400 sets, which can only be purchased in the US. The Flask itself can also be purchased separately, but if you've got $900, you might as well spend the extra $600 and grab that bottle of scotch too. (Editor's note: Turns out that you can't actually buy the flask here in the US. It only comes as a box set with the whisky for $1500.) Sure, the Flask is larger than your normal hip tote, but who doesn't want nearly half a bottle of whisky in a gorgeous hard shell? No one.

Gizmodoscope! Move your mouse around the top photo to move The Flask. Magic!


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$900 flask to hold $5 of liquid. Um, dumb.

Edit: OK, The Macallan is $299.00 itself. Still dumb. Like you would want to drink that from a flask.

Edit 2: "In the US it will only be available as part of a $1,500 set that includes a bottle of oak-aged, 22 year-old The Macallan scotch." Holy Hell!