The Rihanna/Lupita Heist Movie Is the Internet's Only Good Movie Idea

Aimlessly browsing the internet is sort of like taking a pediegg to your callouses without soaking them first. Stuff definitely happens, but it sure as hell ain’t pleasant. Every once in a while, however, something extraordinary rises above the web’s feculent froth. A good idea is churned out by the internet machine and we all get a glimpse of the potential glory of the human race.

In this case, it all started two years ago with a post on Tumblr.


As Tumblr posts go, it was a good one, suggesting a heist film where Rihanna plays a “tough-as-nails leader/master thief” with Lupita Nyong’o as “the genius computer hacker.” So good that it seemed to gestate in peoples’ minds. Lurking in the far corners and reminding them that if the world wasn’t geared to systemically exclude black women from positions of power, we’d probably already have this film and three sequels.

This Tumblr post was so wonderful, in fact, that an 18-year old high school senior, possibly taking a break from a life of college prep and sweet school functions, laid out a very similar concept in a tweet earlier this month.


The big difference between @1800SADGAL’s and @elizabitchtaylor’s posts was the medium each of them used to convey the idea for the best heist film since Inception. elizabitchtaylor is a white girl on Tumblr, a space where fans speak into a void, never noticed by the objects of their admiration. 1800sadgal is a black girl on Twitter, a space populated by thousands of assistants running celebrities’ Twitter feeds, also the home of Black Twitter, one of the more influential cultural groups running around social media.

Thanks to the wonderful power of Black Twitter, both subjects of the photo ended up taking notice.


Then Twitter got to work fleshing out the behind the scenes talent for what will undoubtedly be one of the best films of a generation.


All of this, of course, is bullshit. Movies do not get made because a bunch of people tweet sweet gifs. Movies require funding, usually from old white guys that resemble Tom Cruise in a fat suit. The likelihood of us getting this cinematic masterpiece—that could very well be the proper sequel we deserve to ever buddy comedy ever—is probably slim to none.


But do not underestimate the power of Tumblr, Black Twitter, or Ava DuVernay, who is currently wrapping up her work on the film adaptation A Wrinkle in Time. The director, who has now helmed the biggest movie ever helmed by a black woman, is actually talking with all these talented people in a medium not created by the dumbest man of 2017.

At a speaking engagement Monday DuVernay actually admitted to being in some “conversations” with the talent involved. Per Essence, “I was texting with these sisters today, and there were some interesting conversations. So we’ll see what comes.”


That, of course, means nothing in Hollywood speak. Until a producer has signed on and money is secured, movies are just fanciful dreams. But this one is such an enticing dream that I don’t care. I will embrace optimism and believe that there can be a small spot of joy for every excruciatingly awful mess this world finds itself in.

Thank you internet. You did something not terrible for once.


Senior Consumer Tech Editor. Trained her dog to do fist bumps. Once wrote for Lifetime. Tips encouraged via Secure Drop, Proton Mail, or DM for Signal.

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Actual pitch meeting of this