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New York, 11:40 AM
Fri Dec 18
70 posts in the last 24 hours

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Lexicality Lexicality
    05:59 AM

    In reply to Drugloo Toilet Prevents Prison Guards From Whipping Out The Latex Gloves
    While I can see how it would eliminate the need for guards to have to manually go through someone's poop to remove the evidence, surely in order to find the drugs in the first place, you'd have to shove your hand up their bottom, in which case you might as well grab it while you're in there.
    Unless you give everyone that you suspected might possibly have drugs a really strong laxative and make them sit around for 10 minutes before directing them to the Giant Steel Toilet Of Doom pictured above,(Seriously, it doesn't even have a seat!) I can't see how this could possibly be more cost effective than telling the guards to wrap up, dive in and stop complaining.
     Reply
    Lexicality was starred Lexicality was unstarred
    Image of Jrsy Devil's Advocate® Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
    12/17/09

    In reply to Drugloo Toilet Prevents Prison Guards From Whipping Out The Latex Gloves
    This thing reminds me of an electric chair, which somehow seems appropriate given where it's being used.
     Reply
    Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was starred Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was unstarred
    Image of Alfisted Alfisted
    12/17/09

    In reply to Drugloo Toilet Prevents Prison Guards From Whipping Out The Latex Gloves
    automatic stool pigeon
     Reply
    Alfisted was starred Alfisted was unstarred
    Image of se7a7n7 se7a7n7
    12/17/09

    In reply to Drugloo Toilet Prevents Prison Guards From Whipping Out The Latex Gloves
    This will make my next drug mule job sooooooo much easier.
     Reply
    se7a7n7 was starred se7a7n7 was unstarred
    Image of Yerzriknot Yerzriknot
    12/16/09

    In reply to Bloodhound Detector Sniffs Out Contraband Cellphones: Guess What They Smell Like?
    Now I know what happened to the goatse guy.
     Reply
    Yerzriknot was starred Yerzriknot was unstarred
    Image of Alfisted Alfisted
    12/16/09

    In reply to Bloodhound Detector Sniffs Out Contraband Cellphones: Guess What They Smell Like?
    "What are you doing there, inmate 41359?"

    "Giving birth to another iPhone."
     Reply
    Alfisted was starred Alfisted was unstarred
    Image of PurpleMonkeyDishwasher: PurpleMonkeyDishwasher:
    12/16/09

    In reply to Bloodhound Detector Sniffs Out Contraband Cellphones: Guess What They Smell Like?
    When I found out this device wasn't for detecting bloodhounds, I stopped reading.
     Reply
    PurpleMonkeyDishwasher: was starred PurpleMonkeyDishwasher: was unstarred
    Image of UGAdawg UGAdawg
    12/16/09

    In reply to Bloodhound Detector Sniffs Out Contraband Cellphones: Guess What They Smell Like?
    I guess it's appropriate to call it a RIM job if it's a Blackberry.
     Reply
    Nathan Obbards promoted this comment UGAdawg was starred UGAdawg was unstarred
    Image of Nathan Obbards Nathan Obbards
    12/16/09

    @UGAdawg: And if it's a WinMo phone, it's just shit.
     Reply
    Nathan Obbards was starred Nathan Obbards was unstarred
    Image of ITLawMan ITLawMan
    12/16/09

    @Nathan Obbards: That makes an android phone, a Prostate Massage?
     Reply
    Nathan Obbards promoted this comment ITLawMan was starred ITLawMan was unstarred
    Image of Nathan Obbards Nathan Obbards
    12/16/09

    @ITLawMan: I thought it just guaranteed you always being a bottom. I mean, it is open source and all...

    @JerryA: Nope, I was just being facetious.
     Reply
    Nathan Obbards was starred Nathan Obbards was unstarred
    Image of ITLawMan ITLawMan
    12/16/09

    @Nathan Obbards: I thought that would have gone to Apple. Because you know... Think Different.
     Reply
    Edited by ITLawMan at 12/16/09 7:40 PM ITLawMan was starred ITLawMan was unstarred
    Image of Nathan Obbards Nathan Obbards
    12/16/09

    @ITLawMan: No, those assholes are a little too tight.
     Reply
    Nathan Obbards was starred Nathan Obbards was unstarred
    Image of braceyoself braceyoself
    12/16/09

    In reply to Bloodhound Detector Sniffs Out Contraband Cellphones: Guess What They Smell Like?
    I know they're desperate for their contraband. But, damn... I can't imagine getting my sphincter loose enough to smuggle cell phones and bundles of drugs. I'm sure there's a certain level of pride and shame with having this ability while being locked up.
     Reply
    Nathan Obbards promoted this comment braceyoself was starred braceyoself was unstarred
    Image of Nathan Obbards Nathan Obbards
    12/16/09

    @braceyoself: You learn. Prison teaches you many things...
     Reply
    Nathan Obbards was starred Nathan Obbards was unstarred
    Image of fuchikoma fuchikoma
    12/15/09

    In reply to DECAF App Thwarts Microsoft's Super-Illegal COFEE Forensic Software
    So if you use Microsoft EFS, law enforcement can crack it, but you could lose all your encrypted files anyway if your profile corrupts or someone breaks into your PC with a password changer... but if you use TrueCrypt or something like that, they're just left asking "What the hell is C:\WINDOWS\System32\Drivers\etc\EIO31462.DLL and why is it 10 GB?" :p
     Reply
    fuchikoma was starred fuchikoma was unstarred
    Image of mike.m mike.m
    12/15/09

    In reply to DECAF App Thwarts Microsoft's Super-Illegal COFEE Forensic Software
    "Needless to say, the Computer Online Forensic Evidence Extractor (COFEE) is super-illegal for the average Joe to use"

    You need to do some fact checking before making claims like this. I'm going to cross post a comment from reddit instead of plagarizing.

    What is COFEE?

    [www.reddit.com]

    FTA:

    "COFEE includes the following:

    at, autorunsc, getmac, handle, hostname, ipconfig, msinfo32, nbstat, net, netdom, netstat, openfiles, psfile, pslist, psloggedon, psservice, pstat, psuptime, quser, route, sc, sclist, showgrps, systeminfo, tasklist, whoami"

    Yes, super illegal for the average joe to use netstat.
     Reply
    mike.m was starred mike.m was unstarred
    Image of Numerous Numerous
    12/15/09

    @mike.m: Hey, that IPCONFIG tool is quite dangerous in the wrong hands. Careful!
     Reply
    Nick promoted this comment Numerous was starred Numerous was unstarred
    Image of Nick Nick
    12/15/09

    @Numerous: ipconfig /all

    muhahahahahaha
     Reply
    Nick was starred Nick was unstarred
    Image of paulrules paulrules
    12/15/09

    In reply to DECAF App Thwarts Microsoft's Super-Illegal COFEE Forensic Software
    Obstruction of Justice? Technically, this is illegal to use on your computer IF you're under investigation.

    Plus, placing this on your computer is like screaming "OMG OMG OMG MY COMPUTER CAN'T BE TOUCHED BY COFFEE" on a phone call to the FBI. Seriously. The average Joe doesn't need this.
     Reply
    CaseyG promoted this comment paulrules was starred paulrules was unstarred
    Image of CaseyG CaseyG
    12/15/09

    @paulrules: On the other hand, if you install this now, and in a few months are infected with a virus that downloads child pornography, the trail of evidence is more in your control.

    It's much easier to dismiss a trumped-up charge if everyone discussing the evidence is an expert, rather than a 40-year veteran whose "training" in digital forensics amounts to "Click OK to Continue".
     Reply
    CaseyG was starred CaseyG was unstarred
    Image of paulrules paulrules
    12/15/09

    @CaseyG: This is true. Though, on the site where it allows you to download DECAF, it makes a specific mention of Private Tracker owners...telling us of the real target audience...people who are doing "real" bad things and have something to hide.
     Reply
    paulrules was starred paulrules was unstarred
    Image of dfp3050 dfp3050
    12/15/09

    In reply to DECAF App Thwarts Microsoft's Super-Illegal COFEE Forensic Software
    +1 for macs! lol
     Reply
    dfp3050 was starred dfp3050 was unstarred
    Image of ttk2 ttk2
    12/15/09

    @dfp3050: normally i would not grace a troll with a response but i have to ask how this one got a star.
     Reply
    dfp3050 promoted this comment Edited by ttk2 at 12/15/09 4:20 PM ttk2 was starred ttk2 was unstarred
    Image of dfp3050 dfp3050
    12/15/09

    @ttk2: b/c my comment usually have substance. and i don't complain about other people's comments.
     Reply
    dfp3050 was starred dfp3050 was unstarred
    Image of AOClaus AOClaus
    12/15/09

    @dfp3050: And instead you just make it sound like you're glad it's harder for the cops to find kiddy porn on the hard drive of a Mac, classy.
     Reply
    AOClaus was starred AOClaus was unstarred
    Image of njdevil njdevil
    12/15/09

    In reply to DECAF App Thwarts Microsoft's Super-Illegal COFEE Forensic Software
    "In this case, it's probably best to switch to Tea—or some other drink that hasn't been corrupted. "

    Or, just stop being a pedophile/terrorist/democrat and you won't need to.
     Reply
    Yerzriknot promoted this comment njdevil was starred njdevil was unstarred
    Image of Yerzriknot Yerzriknot
    12/15/09

    @njdevil: I hope you're being sarcastic.
     Reply
    Yerzriknot was starred Yerzriknot was unstarred
    Image of njdevil njdevil
    12/15/09

    @Yerzriknot: Yes.
     Reply
    njdevil was starred njdevil was unstarred
    Image of junyo junyo
    12/15/09

    @njdevil: But I can't resist those sweet, sweet, preteen suicide bomber virgins in "Hope" t shirts.
     Reply
    lpranal promoted this comment junyo was starred junyo was unstarred
    Image of lpranal lpranal
    12/15/09

    @junyo: Why don't you have a... ah hell that sounds like way too much fun, sign me up!
     Reply
    lpranal was starred lpranal was unstarred
    Image of PopandLocke PopandLocke
    12/15/09

    @lpranal: OK, I missed this meme, and have been sitting by in quiet, frustrated confusion for months. Please explain.
     Reply
    lpranal promoted this comment Edited by PopandLocke at 12/15/09 4:00 PM PopandLocke was starred PopandLocke was unstarred
    Image of lpranal lpranal
    12/15/09

    @PopandLocke: like most things in life, this is best explained via southpark:
    [www.southparkstudios.com]
     Reply
    lpranal was starred lpranal was unstarred
    Image of PopandLocke PopandLocke
    12/15/09

    @lpranal: Ah, now I understand. Thank you.
     Reply
    PopandLocke was starred PopandLocke was unstarred
    Image of met2art met2art
    12/15/09

    In reply to DECAF App Thwarts Microsoft's Super-Illegal COFEE Forensic Software
    I've bean expecting trouble to start percolating ever since the leaked COFEE situation starting brewing. Does Microsoft have grounds to get these guys in hot water for their work on DECAF? (As a side note, I noticed this news comes to us via Wired UK... but did the French press have anything to say about it?)
     Reply
    met2art was starred met2art was unstarred
    Image of AmishJohn AmishJohn
    12/15/09

    @met2art: Microsoft spokesman Juan Valdez was said to be 'Steamed', and that they were preparing to COFEE Su Da pants off the creators of this program.
     Reply
    AmishJohn was starred AmishJohn was unstarred
    Image of blash blash
    12/15/09

    @met2art: heart-click!
     Reply
    blash was starred blash was unstarred
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