Are these the most inexplicable comic book ads in the history of the written word?

I honestly have no idea what's going in this 1978 AAU shoe ad. A homeless man begins screaming about a death ray in his shoes, so a superhero with a lisp punts him into the ionosphere. What?

My favorite part of all this is when Dirty Sneaker yammering about his plan to anyone who'll listen, and AAU Shuperstar claims he's divined the villain's scheme using "shupernatural" sleuthing. You can check out more retro weirdness at Comic Book Resources' month-long round-up of flat-out strange comic book advertisements.

Here are some more AAU ads for your bemusement. Shuperstar engages in some light BDSM with a supervillain and thwarts a luchadore from stealing a boy's medicine (or something).

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[Via Mister Kitty]