Sam Biddle

How To Avoid American Drones, by Al-Qaeda

When AP reporters walked through turf where Islamic terrorists had been driven out by the French military, they found a curious photocopied document: a list of 22 tips for avoiding UAV death. But you can use them, too! Most of the stuff seems like pretty solid advice centered around hiding or covering yourself with other…

Every Reason Not to Buy the Google Chromebook Pixel

Google just showed off a dumb new thing: an expensive laptop that pairs the gorgeous screen, capable components, and design of a MacBook Pro with the diluted, web-based Chrome OS. It makes no sense. Don’t buy one. https://gizmodo.com/chromebook-pixel-googles-retina-touchscreen-macbook-5985832 We haven’t had much time to play with the thing, but—like sleeping with your roommate or buying…

The PlayStation 4 Is Here (Update: Sort Of)

It’s been seven years since the giant, boxy, expensive, hugely-fun and hyped PS3 first arrived. Seven years is a long time. But the next expensive, gorgeous era of gaming is here: the PlayStation 4. Everything looks better, yes, but it’s definitely more of the same. The PS4, arriving in stores “Holiday 2013,” is still very…

This Is Objectively the Worst Logo for Anything

Have you ever heard of Highlight? I hope the answer is no, because incoherent “social” app has a logo that’s so horrible it will actually give you a headache. A physical headache, in your head. It’s dangerously bad. TechCrunch says the app—which is a mish mosh of social bullshit, allowing you to tag people, highlight…

Exclusive: The Burger King and Jeep Hacker Is Probably This DJ From New England

It was just going to be another boring President’s Day on the Internet, when along came a spastic, hilarious hacker with a taste for McDonald’s, Gucci Mane, and caps lock. Is a criminal mastermind behind the @BurgerKing (and likely @Jeep) takeover? Nope—just a guy who plays shows in Rhode Island who left an unfortunate Internet…

Apple Hacked (Updated)

Reuters says Apple was targeted by the same crew that recently hit Facebook, and managed to infect a “small number” of the company’s computers. https://gizmodo.com/facebook-got-hacked-last-month-and-is-just-telling-you-5984666 At the moment, Apple says “there was no evidence that any data left” its facilities, but that could change as the firm works with law enforcement. There are few details…

Burger King Twitter Hacked Into McDonald’s (Update: Account Suspended)

Most Twitter hackers go after heads of states or companies to stir up some humiliation. But today’s target is Burger King, which has been transformed into a combination of McDonald’s and amphetamine addict. Enjoy it while it lasts. It’s not Anonymous, it’s not UGNazi, it’s… I have no idea who it is. He seems to…

Mark Zuckerberg and Nas Hung Out (!!!???)

In a social scene that looks like someone spun a roulette wheel, The Zuck, Nas, and mega-rich Silicon Valley investor Ben Horowitz were all in a room for some reason. And it was all Instagrammed. Somehow, the nerd-on-celebrity-gangbang scene—snapped to Instagram by Rap Genius co-founder, Yale Stereotype, and Vyvanse-abuser Mahbod Moghadam—isn’t as painful as you’d…

Tiny Steve Jobs: The Review

Outside of a few close employees, a couple fawning reporters, and his obsequious biographer, few people ever knew Steve Jobs, what with his being an antisocial tyrant. But now, you can own him. Or at least a tiny, unsettlingly realistic miniature computer genius version of him. But should you? Is it moral? Is it good?…

How Stupid Are You Willing to Look for Apple’s Amazing Magical iWatch?

There’s no such thing as the Apple iWatch, and maybe there never will be. But if Cupertino does start selling futurustic Jetsons wrist wear, you need to prepare for one thing: looking like a jackass in public. Worth it? Let’s not ignore the fact that we’re in dumb, murky waters here, discussing the fashionable future…

13 Lazy Christians Giving Up Facebook for Lent

Lent begins today, commemorating the story of Jesus and some friends trapped in the desert, starving, hot, miserable, and tempted by Satan. A reminder of piety. It’s also a depressing reminder of how cripplingly addicted we are to Facebook. The idea behind Lent, if I’ve read this Wikipedia entry correctly, is giving up a vice…

This very thorough analysis of the Battle of Hoth will be one of the best things you read today. And seasonally fitting.

Spy Shots Show (Alleged) Next iPhone Under Construction (Updated: NVM, Prob)

Contrary to reports that Apple is retiring the iPhone forever, 9to5Mac pulled over these Chinese snapshots of what they say is Foxconn assembly line. And on that assembly line—yep, The Next iPhone. Maybe. The shots, if they are real (and given China’s track record with leaked photos the last time around, probably are) confirm what…

Beat By Dre: The Exclusive Inside Story of How Monster Lost the World

There’s never been anything like Beats By Dre. The bulky rainbow headphones are a gaudy staple of malls, planes, clubs, and sidewalks everywhere: as mammoth, beloved, and expensive as their namesake. But Dr. Dre didn’t just hatch the flashy lineup from his freight train chest: The venture began as an unlikely partnership between a record-industry…

Iran Shows Decoded Video from Captured American Drone

If this is what it looks like, this is bad for everyone who isn’t Iran: after claiming the capture of a downed, super-advanced American drone in 2011, we now have what looks like decoded video straight from its brain. The video, which The Aviationist’s David Cenciotti says is indeed shot “from the FLIR turret of…

Here’s the New Most Amazing Hand Dryer in The World

OK, please, give this a chance before you close the tab—a hand dryer can be cool. The Dyson Airblade, that little wonderbox you stick your mitts inside to get a super-fast bathroom dry, just got a super upgrade. The Airblade Tap will change the lives of anyone who goes to the bathroom, integrating the powerful…

Report: Facebook Creating App to Track You and Your Friends

Here’s something that sounds incredibly scary but in reality is probably just slightly scary and overblown: Bloomberg says Facebook is working on a new app that will follow you around via smartphone, reporting your moves to friends. Creepy? Convenient? Both? Neither? From the “two people with knowledge of the matter” who spoke to Bloomberg, the…

Ahmadinejad Wants to “Sacrifice” Himself in Space for Iran

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has a serious resume: nuclear fearmonger, snazzy dresser, Israel-denier, and soon, maybe, his country’s first astronaut. A quasi-insane dictator, in space, hovering over America, manically laughing. After blasting a miserable monkey into space, Iran sounds ready to make the next step—or at least its president is, according to the AP: “I’m…

All of John Kerry’s State Department Tweets Will End with “JK” and Confuse Entire World

John Kerry has proven to be a mostly-uncontroversial candidate for Secretary of State, but there’s a new wrinkle: now that he’s in charge of world diplomacy, he’s going to sign his tweets with JK. What could go wrong! Sure, most people who matter will probably understand that “THE AMERICAN AMBASSADOR TO BARBADOS HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED…

Is the PlayStation 4 Arriving on February 20th?

Well here’s something we weren’t expecting. Sony just teased us with a super secret, super mysterious, super probably a new PlayStation (because, what else?) event next month. Let’s start speculating and freaking out about a new console war. We’re finding out as much as we can, bu for now, set your watches for February 20th,…