Good news: unlike the first movie, Marvel and Hasbro are not missing on having a dancing baby Groot toy out and on shelves to coincide with the launch of the next Guardians of the Galaxy. Bad news: said toy looks like it literally just caught up with all current events news from, say, the past three months.
Entertainment Weekly has revealed the first dancing baby Groot toy for the sequel, from Hasbro, which will be on display later this month at the New York Toy Fair. The figure, clocking in at 11.5" inches tall, lights up and dances along while blasting out Jay andThe Americans’ “Come a Little Bit Closer,” but will also bop along to any music of your choice, if you play it near enough to him.
All of this is very delightful—or it should be, but it’s becoming very apparent that the big-eyed face of the new baby Groot (toddler Groot?) that’s been making us feel all mushy on the inside in the trailers is incredibly difficult to capture in toy form. One wrong step, and like this dancing Groot, you get something that looks a little more like he’s slowly dying on the inside, no matter how much music you play in his general direction.
Does that look like the fact of a sentient plant person who’s happy to be dancing at your every whim? God no. That baby Groot has seen some shit.
Existential Crisis Dancing Groot will be available from Spring, and will cost you $35 if you want one.