Pregnancy? STDs? Pshaw. The real danger of having
intercourse is the possibility that the person you’re having sex with might
turn into a panther and kill you, as Paul Schrader’s erotic 1982 remake of the
1942 horror classic Cat People reveals. Plus, the Machete, Leonard Nimoy, and the best
Robocop ever, all in this week’s DVDs!
• Robocop
4K Remastered Edition
Before you dismiss this as yet another double-dip, this new
edition of Robocop may be worth getting, no matter how many copies you already own It’s the unrated director’s cut with a brand new transfer that supposedly
looks gorgeous, several new features in addition to many classic ones, and it’s
selling for, no foolin’ $8.
This sequel does what it says on the tin. Contains a making
of, deleted and extended scenes, but I’m not sure if it has Machete Kills Again
in Space on it.
Natassja Kinski comes to America to find her long-lost
brother Malcom MacDowell, but instead discovers her sexuality and her curse.
• Never
Sleep Again: The Elm Street Legacy
Basically, this has every Nightmare Before Elm
Street DVD extra you could possibly want… it’s just the movies that aren’t
included. Seriously, you’ll have to hit the link to see all of them.
• Lord
of the Rings: The Motion Picture Trilogy
Where you waiting to buy the Lord of the Rings trilogy when
you could get the movies for $5.66 each, just without any extras whatsoever? Then
January 21st is your lucky day.
A verrrrrry loose 1965 adaptation of H.P. Lovecraft’s short story
“The Color Out of Space”, now on Blu-ray.
• My
Little Pony: Classic Movie Collection
Containing Princess Promenade, Dancing in the Clouds,
Runaway Rainbow, and Friends Are Never Far Away, and truly straining the
definition of the word “classic.”
• Bad
Milo
Easily the finest film about monsters living in people’s
asses since Dreamcatcher, and Dreamcatcher didn’t star Community’s Gillian Jacobs.
• Blue
Submarine No. 6: Complete Collection
The semi-hit Toonami anime comes to Blu-ray. When the polar
ice caps melt and creatures from the sea attack the surface, this
state-of-the-art sub is humanity’s last hope.
• Baffled!
A 1973 horror anthology that features Leonard Nimoy as a
badass racecar driver who receives a disturbing vision at 140mph.
A young lady is somewhat perturbed to discover her flesh is
rotting off.
• Gingerdead
Man Vs. Evil Bong
There is nothing I can say about this movie that the DVD
cover doesn’t say one million times better.
Like Iron Man, but set in Japan, starring a girl not a man,
with 1/100th of the budget, and more boobs.
“A dangerous young woman (Sarah French) offers
up human sacrifices to a ghost ship of the dead in return for an ancient
treasure. When she comes up one sacrifice short, her zombie masters exact
their bloody revenge in this gory tribute to Spain’s popular Blind Dead Euro Horror series.” Sure, why not?
