Steampunk USB Drive (Because You Don't Yet Have a Steampunk USB Drive)

Illustration for article titled Steampunk USB Drive (Because You Don't Yet Have a Steampunk USB Drive)

Remember how steampunk is the next big thing? Yeah, apparently that includes pop idols and USB drives. Because one guy hand-crafted his USB drive from brass and copper in meticulous celebration of an era that never quite happened—unless you count Wild Wild West. And before you do, you should remember that Will Smith is a Scientologist now. How depressing. Here's a bonus shot to ease the sting:

Illustration for article titled Steampunk USB Drive (Because You Don't Yet Have a Steampunk USB Drive)

Not to be a double-downer, but am I the only one who would like steampunk gadgets to start including, I dunno, something like actual steam? [topmods via technabob]


@Git Em SteveDave:

By Jove, you're right, King Arthur !

How to Tell a Witch...

Villager: We have found a witch, may we burn her?


Bedevere: But how do you *know* she is a witch?

Villager: She looks like one!

Other Villagers: Yeah! She looks like one!!!

Bedevere: Bring her forward.

(a young woman is pushed through the crowd of villagers to the platform. She is dressed all in black, has a carrot tied around her face on top of her nose, and a black paper hat on her head. She talks funny because her nose is closed by the carrot.)

Witch: I'm not a witch, I'm not a witch!

Bedevere: Er,...but you are dressed as one.

Witch: THEY dressed me up like this.

Villagers: No! nooo! We didn't! We didn't!

Witch: And this isn't my nose, it's a false one!

(Bedevere lifts up the carrot to reveal the woman's real nose, which is in

fact rather small.)

Bedevere: Well?

One Villager: Well, we did do the nose.

Bedevere: The nose?

Villager: And the Hat. But she's a witch!

Villagers: Yeah! Burn her! Burn! Burn her!

B: Did you dress her up like this?

Villagers: NO! No, no, no, no, no, no...

One Villager: yes.

Villagers: yes. yes. yes. A bit. yes. a bit. a bit.

Another Villager: (hopefully) She has got a wart...

B: What makes you think she is a witch?

Villager: Well, She turned me into a newt!!


Bedevere: a newt?

(long pause)

Villager: I got better...

Villagers: BURN HER anyway! BURN! BURN! BURN HER!

B: Quiet, quiet, quiet, QUIET! There are ways of *telling* whether she is a witch!

Villagers: Are there? What? Tell us, then! Tell us!

B: Tell me. What do you do with witches?


B: And what do you burn apart from witches?

Villager: More Witches!

Other Villager: Wood.

B: So. Why do witches burn?

(long silence)

(shuffling of feet by the villagers)

Villager: (tentatively) Because they're made of.....wood?

B: Goooood!

Other Villagers: oh yeah... oh....

B: So. How do we tell whether she is made of wood?

One Villager: Build a bridge out of 'er!

B: Aah. But can you not also make bridges out of stone?

Villagers: oh yeah. oh. umm...

B: Does wood sink in water?

One Villager: No! No, no, it floats!

Other Villager: Throw her into the pond!

Villagers: yaaaaaa!

(when order is restored)

B: What also floats in water?

Villager: Bread!

Another Villager: Apples!

Another Villager: Uh...very small rocks!

Another Villager: Cider!

Another Villager: Uh...great gravy!

Another Villager: Cherries!

Another Villager: Mud!

Another Villager: Churches! Churches!

Another Villager: Lead! Lead!

King Arthur: A Duck!

Villagers: (in amazement) ooooooh!

B: exACTly!

B: (to a villager) So, *logically*...

Villager: (very slowly, with pauses between each word) If...she...weighs the same as a duck......she's made of wood.

B: and therefore...


Villager: A Witch!

All Villagers: A WITCH!

/sorry. sorry one and all. he asked for it. couldn't resist. it's Friday. WTF.