Ever wonder what the face might look like for that skull-shaped Crystal Head vodka bottle? Well, one Scottish forensic scientist recently found out.

A full quarter of Russian men die before their 55th birthday. Compare that to America's 1% and the UK's 7%. Why the disparity? There's a good chance it has something to do with the country's vodka consumption.

Generally speaking, it's what's inside a bottle that counts. It could come out of a yak udder just as long as it still tastes like a fine, single-malt Scotch. Still, there's nothing wrong with a little creative packaging. And booze bottles come in some of the most creative, decadent, and just plain bizarre designs you…

Sometimes you just don't have the right resources to make a decent drink. But if you get enough sober, thirsty minds focused on the problem, humans can find some pretty creative ways to come up with alcohol.

Eighty-nine years ago, Congress passed the 21st amendment and repealed Prohibition. The country breathed a collective, blind drunk sigh of relief. You can commemorate the presence of no sauce in the states by making some gin of your own, and you don't even need a whole fancy distilling system.

In a ridiculous fire story that even firefighters couldn't believe, a vodka bottle acted as a magnifying glass for sunlight to burn through a liquor store. Seriously.

Infusing liquor is the secret to a lot of great cocktails. You can add rosemary to rum. You can add beef to rye whiskey. The possibilities are endless, but one thing is constant. It takes a long time. Days—even weeks—sealed in a jar.

Earlier this year, English company Master of Malt scorched mouths and livers with the world's hottest vodka. Rated to 100,000 Scoville Heat Units, you'd want to chase it with an iceberg.

Some people really enjoy the feeling of being drunk, but hate having to do all that pesky drinking. Maybe they don't want the calories. Maybe they don't like the taste. Maybe they're in a hurry, and the normal metabolic process is a waste of time. Regardless, the lengths to which some will go to get their swerve on…

It comes in a plastic bottle. It tastes like pouring battery acid down your throat. It smells like a robot's corpse. For around ten bucks—you can get a lot of it.

Some bartenders have a chip on their shoulders when it comes cocktails. Shaking waters it down, they say. Stirring is better. James Bond is a pussy.

Culinary masochists rejoice! This hyper-hot vodka doesn't just burn on the way down, it ionizes.

If you've been looking for an excuse to drink all morning, I just found you one: according to a recent study, drinking vodka improves word association and verbal creativity. Somebody pass the bottle.

You've spent all your money on Christmas presents, and you're tired of spending time in the kitchen, but you're throwing a New Year's party and you need strong, delicious punch in high quantity to ensure everyone gets their swerve on. What to do? Skipper. Good God, Skipper.

When I was a kid, there used to be a mason jar in my house that was always kept just out of my reach. It looked like it was filled yogurt, but grosser. Runny, chunky, with a sickly yellow color. I didn't find out until years later that it was actually the most delicious milk liqueur I've ever tasted.