Amazon is at once one of the best and worst things that could've happened to the human race—it's also one of the most universally popular. And what happens when you combine the unwashed, oblivious masses with an open customer review platform? Magic is what happens. You get magic.

And we're not talking about the intentionally witty, sarcastic, or trolling. Those are great, sure, but there's something extra special about an absolutely absurd review written 100 percent in earnest.

Perhapse they're a little too preemptive.

Or slightly crude.


Or maybe they're just straight up crazy.

Whatever they are, we want to see 'em. So go out there and find the best worst Amazon reviews you can possibly find, and share them with us down below. And the next time someone starts extolling the many virtues of crowdsourcing—remember this.