Details are scarce, but we do know this: a man and a woman broke into a Hillsboro, MO garage on Sunday to steal things. Then they got sidetracked by having sex with each other. And then it got weird.
According to KDSK news, the woman decided—mid-coitus!—to spray her accomplice/lover in the face with pepper spray, stealing his car and driving it just far enough to crash into a pond two miles away.
The man, meanwhile, undeterred by eyes that were essentially on fire, managed to stuff power tools and portable DVD players into a bag and take off on foot down the road, where he was apprehended a short time later.