Recently, the Star Wars fanbase took time off from freaking out about The Force Awakens to freak out over a rumored ban on merchandise depicting Princess Leia’s “Slave” outfit from Return of the Jedi. Many words about the matter have been said since—a lot of them pretty good!—but leave it to Leia herself to put it best.
During the big marketing push for The Force Awakens, the debate over whether or not it’s right to sell toys of the scantily clad Leia has been put forth to the actor—and naturally, someone as wonderfully outspoken as Carrie Fisher does not hold back.
Here’s a tame, but still pretty damn fantastic, response she gave to the Wall Street Journal:
There’s been some debate recently about whether there should be no more merchandise with you in the “Return of the Jedi” bikini.
I think that’s stupid.
To stop making the merchandise?
The father who flipped out about it, “What am I going to tell my kid about why she’s in that outfit?” Tell them that a giant slug captured me and forced me to wear that stupid outfit, and then I killed him because I didn’t like it. And then I took it off. Backstage.
Yeah, empowered Hutt-slaying Leia! But Fisher had a far testier response when it came to a similar question over at the L.A. Times:
How about telling his daughter that the character is wearing that outfit not because she’s chosen to wear it. She’s been forced to wear it. She’s a prisoner of a giant testicle who has a lot of saliva going on and she does not want to wear that thing and it’s ultimately that chain, which you’re now indicating is some sort of accessory to S&M, that is used to kill the giant saliva testicle…. That’s asinine.
Thanks, Carrie Fisher. From now on I can no longer think of Jabba the Hutt’s name as anything other than “Giant Saliva Testicle”. Seems like after 30+ years of dealing with stuck-up, half-witted, scruffy-lookin’ Nerf herders, Carrie Fisher still doesn’t tolerate your nonsense, either way!
Maybe we could just like, I dunno, treat her like Han and Luke and have BAZILLIONS of different Leia toys, instead of just slave Leia ones? No? Too sensible? Just give me my Hoth Leia action figure, goddamit.