The prophecies of the French astrologer Nostradamus remain famous more than 400 years after his death. He has been credited with predicting events like the French Revolution and World War II. But, after careful scrutiny, we present evidence that his prophecies were, in fact, plot spoilers for the Star Wars films.
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Nostradamus' prophecies were written in such vague, metaphorical language, that, over the years, people have selectively quoted and interpreted them to prove that he could see centuries into the future.
But, did it ever occur to anyone that Nostradamus wasn't predicting events, but film plots? More specifically, that Nostradamus, through his visions, saw the entire Star Wars saga before it was even made? We believe his writings were those of an enthusiastic fan and, as proof, we present his prophecies and—for the first time in history—interpret them for what they really are.
What it really means: Undermined by corruption and bureaucracy, Finis Valorum, the Supreme Chancellor of the Galactic Republic, is removed from office through a vote of no confidence, and replaced by Senator Palpatine, who is secretly Darth Sidious.
What it really means: Jar Jar Binks takes it upon himself to propose that the Senate grant immediate emergency powers to Supreme Chancellor Palpatine, in response to the threat from the Confederacy of Independent Systems.
The Prophecy: "That which neither weapon nor flame could accomplish will be achieved by a sweet speaking tongue in council"
What it really means: As part of his plan to infiltrate and bring down the Jedi Order, Palpatine persuades Anakin Skywalker to become his personal representative in the Jedi Council and serve as the "the eyes, ears, and voice of the Republic."
The Prophecy: "Those most lettered in the celestial facts…punished by Edict, hunted, like criminals, and put to death wherever they will be found."
What it really means: The Great Jedi Purge begins with Order 66, in which Palpatine tells the Clone commanders to execute the Jedi Knights.
The Prophecy: "A man will be charged with the destruction of temples and sects, altered by fantasy…ears filled with ornate speeches"
What it really means: Anakin Skywalker, haunted by premonitions of Padme Amidala's death, is enticed to join the Dark Side of the Force, which Palpatine says will endow him with the power to save her life. Upon becoming Darth Vader, his first order from Palpatine is to kill everyone in the Jedi Temple.
What it really means: Speaking before the Galactic Senate, Palpatine declares:
"In order to ensure our security and continuing stability, the Republic will be reorganized into the first Galactic Empire, for a safe and secure society which I assure you will last for ten thousand years. An empire that will continue to be ruled by this august body, and a sovereign ruler chosen for life . . . An Empire ruled by the majority . . . Ruled by a new constitution."
"So this is how liberty dies, with thunderous applause," says Padme Amidala.
What it really means: Defeated by Emperor Palpatine, Jedi Master Yoda flees to the swamp world of Dagobah.
What it really means: Padme Amidala, heart-broken by Anakin's betrayal, dies shortly after giving birth to Luke and Leia. "Medically, she is completely healthy," says the attending medical droid. "She has lost the will to live."
The Prophecy: "Sooner and later you will see great changes made, dreadful horrors and vengeances. For as the Moon is thus led by its angel the heavens draw near to the Balance"
What it really means: The Empire's reign of terror escalates with the construction of the Death Star—which Nostradamus metaphorically describes as a "Moon." Likewise, an angel is often defined as an "emissary of the Lord." So, when Nostradamus writes that the "Moon is thus led by its angel," he is saying that the Death Star is under the command of Grand Moff Tarkin, the Imperial representative of the Lord of the Sith.
These incidents, which unfold in Episode IV: A New Hope, mark the beginning of a sequence of events that—as Nostradamus predicts—will lead to the restoration of Balance within the Force.
What it really means: Imperial ground forces, commanded by General Veers, land outside the shield protecting the Rebel Base on Hoth, and march overland to destroy the power generator.
The Prophecy: "The chief adversary will obtain the victory: The rear guard will make a defense, the faltering ones dead in the white territory."
What it really means: Having destroyed the shield generator, the Empire commences its all-out assault on the Rebel Base on Hoth, as the rebels attempt to buy time for their transports to escape. Rebel troops are struck down by the advancing Imperial forces, their bodies lying on the snowy surface of Hoth—which Nostradamus refers to as "the white territory."
The Prophecy: "Through great dangers the captive escaped. In a short time great his fortune changed. In the palace the people are trapped"
What it really means: Princess Leia Organa, disguised as a bounty hunter, manages to free Han Solo from his carbonite coffin. However, before they can escape, they are captured by Jabba the Hutt and imprisoned in his palace.
What it really means:Luke Skywalker defeats his father, Darth Vader, in a light-saber duel aboard the second Death Star.
What it really means: Emperor Palpatine tortures and prepares to kill Luke Skywalker, who pleads for his father to help. Darth Vader chooses his son over his dark master—reversing his ill-fated decision years before—and kills Palpatine by throwing him down the Death Star's reactor shaft.
The Prophecy: "The prince who has little pity of mercy will come through death to change…..After his death one will see a great marvel."
What it really means: The "prince who has little pity of mercy" is Darth Vader, the acolyte of Darth Sidious. As he dies, he tells his son to leave him. Luke refuses, saying "I've got to save you." His father responds, "You already have."
Amid the celebration of the Empire's defeat, Luke Skywalker sees three shimmering, smiling figures at the edge of the shadows: Ben Kenobi, Yoda and his father, now restored to his true persona, Anakin Skywalker.