GIF: Fight for the Future

Have you heard the news? Someone is launching another goddamn service. This time, if I recall correctly, it’s Amazon.

According to a report from Billboard last week, Amazon is planning to launch a new music service—its third music service, in fact, after its paid services Amazon Music Unlimited and Prime Music. Citing sources familiar with the matter, Billboard reported that the service will offer a free, limited catalog of music available through its Alexa devices. (Amazon did not immediately return a request for comment about the report.)

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Reader, if you have what I will refer to from here on out as Services Fatigue, you are not alone.

To say that services have somewhat flooded the news cycle recently would be an extreme understatement. Apple really kicked it into high gear this year with so many freaking services that anyone would be forgiven for forgetting any or all of them. There’s Apple News+, Apple Arcade, Apple TV+, and if you count its app-powered credit card, then tack on the Apple Card as well.

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The Criterion Channel also recently launched a streaming service, and WarnerMedia is getting a streaming service as well that will reportedly compete with Netflix. Let us not forget about T-Mobile’s TV service with the unfortunate name TVision Home. And Google also recently announced its new gaming service Stadia.

Most recently, we learned of the Netflix competitor Disney+, a mammoth service that will offer Pixar, Star Wars, Marvel, National Geographic, and of course Disney programs all in one place for $7. It may also be bundled with ESPN+ and Hulu services at a discounted rate—arguably another service option entirely!

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Now, in its thinly veiled attempt to overthrow basically every market under the Sun, Amazon has introduced another into this mix. All this is to say, there are too many damn services. In fact, this ad-supported music streaming service is a lot like Amazon’s ad-supported video streaming service that it launched in January to compliment Prime.

Brands: Please, no more. We’re sorry for complaining. The cord is now cut. That’s enough, thanks.

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[Billboard]