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Mr. President, Now Is the Time to Tweet

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Former FBI director James Comey has been testifying before the Senate Intelligence Committee for over an hour. Twitter is aflame with reporters tweeting quotes and idiots telling jokes. It is hot, hot, hot.

But it is not enough. Washington Post reporter Robert Costa reported on Tuesday that President Trump might “live tweet if he feels the need to respond” to Comey’s testimony.

So far, Trump has not tweeted.

So, Mr. President, what are you doing? Who has taken your phone? Where are you? We want your tweets. We crave your stupid, shitty, self-sabotaging, unhinged, weirdly capitalized thoughts. We need your unfiltered soul poured into our outstretched hands.

Your largest son is tweeting, but it is not enough.

Sir, SIR, it is an abomination. Do the right thing. Your country needs you.

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