Shortly before 1am last night, the Chicago Cubs clinched their first World Series title in 108 years. Chicago went crazy, Bill Murray and Theo Epstein got sloshed on camera, and J.R. Smith probably got kind of cold.
While the game was still in progress, however, noted bloviator Neil deGrasse Tyson decided to weigh in on the Cubs’ chances, turning himself into the human equivalent of a wet blanket in the process.
The last time the Chicago Cubs won the World Series, the existence of the Atom had only recently been established.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) November 3, 2016
The last time the Cubs won the World Series, the Wright Brothers were debating if aeroplanes could ever fly from NYC to Paris
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) November 3, 2016
The last time the Chicago Cubs won the World Series, the Periodic Table had only 85 Elements on it.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) November 3, 2016
The last time the Chicago Cubs won the World Series, the cosmic object known as Pluto was not yet discovered
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) November 3, 2016
(I’m not going to put every one of his 11 tweets in here, because we all deserve better than that, but the rest of them are easily found on his timeline, which is a delightful hate-read in and of itself.)
You might be wondering at this point how Neil knows so much about the year 1908. The answer, as any high school student will tell you: Wikipedia, baby.
motherfucker, you're just tweeting shit from the 1908 Wikipedia page. @neiltyson pic.twitter.com/qjbonikiKp
— Sonar Jose (@SonarJose) November 3, 2016
In fairness, not every one of his tweets was sourced from Wikipedia.
The last time the Chicago Cubs won the World Series, Real Estate developer Donald Trump was running for President of the USA.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) November 3, 2016
Better stick to tweeting about sex, Neil. Just kidding.
[Twitter]
