Behold the wondrous miracle of nature! Follow along as famed naturalist and television host David Attenborough narrates the intricate mating dance between two members of the Half-Clothed Popstar species (Divas majoris).

This dance, though performed exclusively in front of national audiences, has only once been caught on filmā€”in large part because everybody that watches it winds up feeling a bit pervy by the end and refuses to admit having actually seen it. Kind of like that video tape from The Ring but with more twerking.