Tyra Banks Plans Tell-All On Twilight's Monsoon Of Fans

Illustration for article titled Tyra Banks Plans Tell-All On Twilight's Monsoon Of Fans

Still confused about all this crying and screaming mob nonsense surrounding the Twilight movie? Don't worry — Tyra Banks is going to get to the bottom of it, by inviting the weeping fan masses onto her show. I can just see it now: Tyra Banks in all her "look at me, look at me" glamor parading little 13-year-olds around like the Lion King cub crying about vampires and Robert Pattinson. Give it to them straight, Ty-Ty — let them know that these vamps are total ninnies and they need to be fawning over the fierce vamps of yesteryear, not these silly little pasty faced girly fangers that "glisten" in the sun, and while you're at it give them some tips on how to look listless. The full email is below.

LOOKING FOR GIRLS WHO WERE AT TWILIGHT EVENT IN SF! Hi, My name is XXXX and I work at the Tyra Banks show in NY. I am looking for girls who were at the TWILIGHT event in San Francisco and was wondering if there is any way you can post something about that or put me in touch with people who were at the event. We are looking huge fans of TWILIGHT who want to share their story on the show. If this is possible, please let me know. I would appreciate your help because I am having difficulties finding people who were at the event. Thank you, XXXXXX —


So should you love mop-headed dead-eyes boy so much it hurts, why not send in your information and get a special spot on Trya Banks' couch.


Chris Braak

Nothing has made me feel more old than this Twilight nonsense. Except for, possibly, the stuff about the Jonas Brothers.

I've become my grandfather. "What now? Internet? What is that nonsense?"