USB Absinthe Spoon Makes You Think It Has a Function

Illustration for article titled USB Absinthe Spoon Makes You Think It Has a Function

Here's the first cousin to the electric fork, the USB absinthe spoon. The makers of the prototype you see above are looking for volunteers to test this precision instrument, used to hold a sugar cube onto which you pour the bitterly awful-tasting absinthe to make it palatable. But what does USB have to do with it? Perhaps its inventors imbibed too much absinthe, and forgot to determine a reason for plugging the thing into a USB port.


If you're not familiar with absinthe, it's an alcoholic beverage that's illegal in the United States. Why is it illegal? Because somebody said one time a long time ago that la Fée Verte (the green fairy) made you hallucinate, which it probably doesn't. Of course, anything that might cause even a hint of hallucination has got to be illegal in the US, doesn't it?

They Said We Couldn't Do It [Absinthe Spoon]


Good quality absinthe (search: Jade liqueurs, expect to pay $80 for a 750ml bottle) needs no sugar, but I like a bit of sugar as a preference. A dilution of VERY cold water is necessary. It opens up the flavours, develops the louche, etc. Under no circumstances should one light a sugarcube that is going to be consumed with absinthe on fire. This is poor form and pure hot topic mallgoth faggotry. No absinthe I've ever had made me "hallucinate". According to articles I've read, the thujone is reduced to a parts per million level in the distillation process.

There are good articles about absinthe on [] and another article the new yorker did that are both good primers. Again, search jade liqueurs or Ted Breaux.