Matt Novak

Tim Cook’s $700k Security Spending Is Small Compared To Other Major CEOs

The Apple nerd community is buzzing about how much the company pays for Tim Cook’s security. $700,000 to protect just one guy! The thing no one seems to be mentioning? Other tech companies spend a lot more on CEO security. If we compare the amount Apple spends on Cook’s security to what companies like Oracle…

Don’t Have Cable for The Republican Debate? Try Periscope, If You Dare

If you don’t have a cable subscription, you won’t be able to watch tonight’s Republican Presidential debate on Fox News.Which feels so 20th century. But if you’re a cordcutter who’s really desperate, we might humbly suggest you try Periscope. People are already streaming the “kids’ table” version of the Presidential debates on Periscope now. The…

It Has Been Zero Days Since the US Government Was Last Hacked

Same as it ever was. [August 6, 2015] Contact the author at [email protected].

This isn’t helping your case…

Will This Adorable Patrol Robot Ever Find What It’s Looking For?

This little patrol robot was recently spotted at a transformer substation in Chuzhou, China. But will it ever find what it’s looking for? Maybe it’s over to the right. Nah, not there. Maybe it’ll find what it’s searching for over to its left. Not there either. Well, what if it gets a little closer while…

Facebook Is Hosting the Republican Debate, So Why Can’t We Watch Online?

Thursday’s debate between Republican candidates for President is must see TV. But if you’re a cordcutter who doesn’t subscribe to traditional TV, you’re sadly out of luck. The highly anticipated debate is co-hosted by Facebook, but the only legal way to watch it live is on Fox News. It almost seems like a no-brainer that…

Whoever Found hitchBOT Brought Him to Meet Kevin Smith Last Night

The hitchBOT story just keeps getting weirder. After getting beheaded in Philly this past weekend some people thought he’d be lost forever. But that little hitchhiking robot has popped up again. This time hitchBOT made an appearance in Brooklyn with director Kevin Smith. Apparently whoever found hitchBOT contacted the Canadian researchers that made him and…

Things That Are Pranks and Things That Are Not Pranks

For your consideration… Things that are pranks: Reprogramming hitchBOT to sound like HAL from Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey Taking hitchBOT to Mount Rushmore and leaving him on Teddy Roosevelt’s moustache Making hitchBOT a real boy through magic and/or sorcery Auditioning hitchBOT for the lead role in a buddy comedy opposite David Spade Things that…

Vloggers Faked a Surveillance Video, But Did They Destroy hitchBOT?

It’s now clear that two video bloggers faked a “surveillance video” showing the destruction of hitchBOT, the hitchhiking robot. What’s still unclear is whether the pair were responsible for actually destroying the bot, and whether we can expect more to come from their “prank.” Jesse Wellens and Ed Bassmaster were the last people to see…

Here’s Video of the Jerk Who Killed hitchBOT [Update: It’s a Hoax]

The hitchhiking robot known as hitchBOT was destroyed in Philadelphia over the weekend. And now we finally have footage of the jerk who did it. Vlogger Jesse Wellens posted the footage below to Snapchat. It shows a lone man in a sports jersey repeatedly kicking hitchBOT. Judging from the timecode, the person kicks hitchBOT at…

Vlogger Claims to Have Surveillance Cam Footage of hitchBOT’s Death

Beloved hitchhiking robot hitchBOT was destroyed by vandals in Philadelphia over the weekend, and everyone wants to know who would do such a thing. We may soon have an answer. Vlogger Jesse Wellens claims to have security camera footage of hitchBOT’s demise. Wellens, whose video blog BFvsGF has over 7.3 million subscribers, was among the…

Hitchhiking Robot Lasts Just Two Weeks in US Because Humans Are Terrible

When hitchBOT the hitchhiking robot started his journey in Boston two weeks ago he wanted to see the entire country. Unfortunately, he never made it out of the Northeast. The researchers who built hitchBOT announced today that they need to stop the experiment because hitchBOT was vandalized in Philadelphia. From the researchers who built hitchBOT:…

What If Everybody James Woods Talked Shit About On Twitter Sued Him?

James Woods has filed a $10 million lawsuit against a semi-anonymous Twitter user who tweeted that the actor was acocaine addict. Many people are holding up this case as the perfect example of the Streisand Effect, where more attention is drawn to the accusations by suing rather than ignoring the trolls. But what if Woods…

FBI Struggling With Cybersecurity Because of Shit Pay and Drug Tests

It’s no secret that American businesses and the government are under constant attack from hackers around the world. That’s just the nature of living in the 21st century. But a new audit says that America is even less prepared to defend against these attacks than we thought. The problem? Competent people don’t want to work…

America’s Largest Theater Chain Hates the Plan To Speed Up Home Releases

Earlier this month Paramount announced that it would release two upcoming films on home video and streaming just 17 days after they’ve been in theaters. But Regal, the nation’s largest movie chain, isn’t interested in being part of its piracy-fighting experiment. Regal Cinemas made it clear on an earnings call yesterday that it wouldn’t be…

Cops Pose as Road Workers to Catch Drivers Checking Their Phones

Be careful the next time you’re at a stoplight and want to get a quick peek at your phone. That friendly construction worker beside your car might actually be a cop playing dress-up. Yes, police in Marietta, Georgia have recently begun handing out $150 tickets for “distracted driving” by posing as road workers. Despite the…

Police Body Cams Are Big Business: Taser’s Profits Jump By 57 Percent

Taser International, the company best known for its namesake product, announced today that its profits were up 57 percent over the previous quarter. But it’s not because tasers are flying off the shelves. That huge bump in profits is coming from sales of body cameras to America’s police departments. As the Wall Street Journal reports,…

9 More Viral Photos That Are Actually Fake

Sometimes it feels like half of the internet is just fake photos. Whether it’s Elvis cutting Johnny Cash’s hair (FAKE), Hillary Clinton posing next to someone in an ‘I’m With Stupid’ t-shirt (FAKE) or John Lennon on a skateboard (FAKE FAKE FAKE), we’re breaking down the latest fakes swirling around the internet. 1. Is this…

Celebrate Bugs Bunny’s 75th Birthday With This 1944 Short About 2000 AD

Unofficially, Bugs Bunny turns 75 today. It’s unofficial because Warner Bros doesn’t recognize birthdays of fictional characters. But that’s no reason we can’t celebrate! And what better way than looking at Bugs Bunny predictions for the year 2000? In 1944 Warner Bros released the Bugs Bunny/Elmer Fudd cartoon The Old Grey Hare. Directed by Bob…

Elon Musk and Stephen Hawking Call for Ban on Autonomous Military Robots

There’s no question that the age of autonomous killing machines is upon us. But some very smart and very influential people would like to turn back the clock. Over 1,000 people from the worlds of tech, space travel, computing, and mathematics have signed an open letter calling for an end to the autonomous weapons arms…