Although there have been six high-grossing (if not always beloved) Jurassic Park/World movies, it’s never enjoyed the robust action figure series that accompanied other major film franchises like Star Wars or the Marvel Cinematic Universe. That’s probably because the real stars of the movies are dinosaurs and not the various scientists, kids, and rich old men accompanying them. But for you Jurassic fans who have always dreamed of owning the cast of the films in plastic form, a major omission will soon be rectified. And it will come with a toilet.
Mattel has announced that it will be releasing a set of the Tyrannosaurus Rex and the first-ever Gennaro figure at San Diego Comic-Con. If the name Gennaro doesn’t ring any bells, that’s likely because he’s the uptight lawyer from the first Jurassic Park movie who arrives ready to shut it down—which, obviously, would have been an extremely good idea—but then sees the dinosaurs and decides park creator John Hammond should charge people $2,000-$10,000 to attend. When things go haywire and the dinosaurs get loose, Gennaro hides in an outhouse until the T.Rex arrives and... oh, I’ll let the fine folks at the Jurassic Park fan wiki do the honors:
“Gennaro starts reciting the ‘Hail Mary’ prayer but quickly gives up and slams the stall door shut. This effort proves futile as the Tyrannosaurus smashes its head through the door and causes the entire structure to collapse around Gennaro. He attempts to stay still, but the rain causes him to make the foolish decision to rub his eyes, blowing his cover. The Tyrannosaurus then bites down on his upper-body, lifts him off the toilet, and violently shakes him around, breaking his bones, tears him apart, and eats him.”
Mattel hasn’t released the size or pricing of the set, but if Gennaro is a 3.75-inch action figure, the same size as Star Wars’ Vintage Collection, that’s a mighty big T.Rex figure and will likely cost a pretty penny. If you’re not going to Comic-Con, however, you still have your chance at buying one over at Mattel’s Creations site at 12:00 pm ET on Friday, July 22.
Fun fact: While Gennaro dies on the toilet in the movie, in Michael Crichton’s original Jurassic Park novel, the character apparently succumbed to dysentery. So in either medium, he died shitting himself. The more you know!
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