Whenever someone speaks these four words,
he or she is marked for death. No, not “I love you too” — but
“I’ll hold them off.” Whoever volunteers to hold off the bad guys while
everyone else gets away is doomed. Except not always. Here are people who held
off the bad guys and lived.
Note: We could only find five examples of
people who actually said “I’ll hold them off” (or responded in the affirmative
to “You hold them off”) and lived to tell the tale. Because that
phrase is lethal. But we also found several more examples of people who did
hold off the hordes — without saying that exact phrase — and survived. We’ve
divided this list into both categories.
SAID IT
Captain America to
Hawkeye in the Avengers
In this case, Captain America tempts
fate for Hawkeye by asking him if he can hold off the Chitauri who have landed
nearby. Eager for revenge after being mind-controlled, Hawkeye easily holds
back the enemy so Cap can help out some nearby police officers. You’d think
this would be a case where the person
making the stand dies, because there are massive aliens with advanced weaponry
against a guy wielding a primitive weapon with finite ammo. But this movie has
already sated Joss Whedon’s bloodlust with Agent Coulson, and Hawkeye has an
action figure.
Captain America in Captain America #54
Captain America has earned the right to ask Hawkeye to stay and hold off the Chitauri while he gets civilians to safety — because in this comic, he holds off an entire army while Sharon gets some imprisoned soldiers to the rendezvous. “It’s all on the shoulders of one man,” she says — and Cap pulls it off. (Thanks to rich1 and Mweyer for this one!)
Luke in
The Mortal Instruments: City of Ashes
by Cassandra Clare
Luke and Jace get attacked by basically a
billion demons, too many to count. Luke tells Jace that they’re surrounded and
adds, “Jump over the side. I’ll hold them off.” And then he does
suffer a broken leg — but he makes it out of there okay. Of course, Jace winds
up giving Luke a bit of an assist instead of making his escape, so it’s not
quite the classic trope.
Delgado in
Halo: The Cole Protocol by Tobias Buckell
In this video game tie-in novel, Delgado
and Melko are cornered by the Kig-Yar, aka the Jackals. And Delgado tells
Melko, “Make the run, Melko. I’ll hold them off.” He tells her to
blow the locks and get on board their ship and make a run for it, in case
there’s a Jackal ship incoming. Delgado even tells Melko, “See you on the
other side” — which is usually the ultimate kiss of death. But no, he
makes it out of there in one piece, making good his escape after he covers
hers.
Lennox in
Transformers
No human is as cool as a Transformer, but
in the first Michael
Bay film, Captain William
Lennox has his moments. One in particular comes at the end where he gives the
AllSpark to Sam, saying he’ll hold off the Decepticons long enough for him to
get the cube to Optimus Prime and the others. It doesn’t exactly work — but Lennox survives, despite saying the exact phrase.
Castiel
in Supernatural
And in the most badass case of actually
saying the deadly words, Castiel holds off the archangels so that Dean can save
Sam and stop him from initiating the apocalypse in the season 4 finale. He even
says it twice. Of course, Castiel does
die — but he comes back, good as new.
DIDN’T SAY
IT, BUT DID IT
Gandalf in
Lord of the Rings
In what may be the most memorable
“I’ll hold them off” moment of all time, Gandalf protects the rest of
the Fellowship from the deadly Balrog. Technically he does die — but like
Castiel, he comes back better than ever. So that counts, right? Image by Luke Lagonda on Deviant Art
River Tam in
Serenity
All Firefly fans knew the disappointment
of never seeing River Tam become the badass we knew she’d be — and then
Serenity happened. Just when things look hopeless at the end of the film, River
holds off a group of Reavers so the rest of the crew can survive. It looks as
though she’s doomed — but then, she kicks the shit out of every last reaver.
Shikamaru in
Naruto
After Sasuke gets captured during the
invasion of Konoha, Shikamaru goes with Naruto and Sakura to take him back. But
when nine sound ninjas ambush the gang, Shikamaru volunteers to stay behind and
handle things so the rest of Team 7 can get Sasuke back. He’d have died, too,
if Asuma didn’t show up at the last minute to save him.
Brent in Cloudy
With a Chance of Meatballs
Until Flint
cast an out of control food-storm over Swallow Falls,
the best thing Brent ever did was be the adorable mascot of sardines. But then,
when things got stickiest (or tastiest, rather), Brent protects Sam and Flint and buys them enough
time to stop the FLDSMDFR
Luffy in One
Piece
Rob Lucci is a deadly assassin who wanted
nothing more than to kill the Straw Hat crew and stop them from saving Nico
Robin. And though the crew is often split up and forced to fight their enemies
one on one, this time everyone would have died if Luffy didn’t hold Lucci on
his own.
Morpheus in
The Matrix
Morpheus’ value always seemed tied to
finding Neo, but he did manage to prove his worth by holding off the Agents so
everyone else could escape. And for a while it looked like he’d be dead meat
(deleted data?), the gang rescues him at the last minute.
Leela in
Doctor Who
This happens a lot to Leela in various
episodes of the Tom Baker era, including “The Invisible Enemy” and
“The Sunmakers.” She’s constantly holding off superior numbers of attackers
so that the other heroes can escape or save the day, either by herself or with
K9. This leads to her getting captured in “The Sunmakers,” but mostly
Leela can hold off a small army by herself with no ill effects. Also Orfe holds
off the robots in “Underworld” and nothing bad happens. And Captain
Jack buys the Doctor a bit more time in “The Parting of the Ways”
when the Daleks attack — and does die, but comes back.
Team
Rocket in A Poached Ego
Jessie and James occasionally prove to be
decent human beings, and in this episode they protect their Arbok and Weezing —
as well as a horde of Ekans and Koffings — by stalling a poacher and his
Tyranitar before they could finish their job.
Wikus in
District 9
When Christopher Johnson manages to
scrape together enough fuel for an escape, Wikus opts to stay behind and hold
off the soldiers that come to shoot the mothership down. Despite the fact that
he turns into an alien, he does survive.
Ichigo in Bleach
When Ichigo finally saves Rukia from her
execution, in the episode “An Accomplished Oath! Get Back Rukia!”, three lieutenants and a captain show up to try and take her back. To
save her, Ichigo orders Renji to get Rukia out of there while he holds them
off. And he makes it out in one piece.
Syrio
Florel in A Game of Thrones
Actually, this one remains ambiguous.
When the Lannisters come for Arya Stark, Syrio holds them off while she
escapes. And we never actually see whether he survives — but many, many fan
theories hold that we haven’t seen the last of Syrio. After all, he’s the guy
who can look at death and say, “Not today.”
Commander
Shepard’s origin, in Mass Effect
Depending on your choices, Shepard can be
a hero for having singlehandedly held off a massive force of Batarian slavers.
But when you realize he turns Reapers to scrap metal, it sems less impressive
in perspective.
Corran
Horn in Star Wars: Rogue Squadron
Star Wars is full of people holding off
hordes, including Han Solo and the stormtroopers a few times. But the most
perfect example of this is Corran Horn in the expanded universe book series
Rogue Squadron. Corran is forced to distract a capital ship alone so that everyone
else can survive. Not only does he hold the enemy off long enough for everyone
to escape, but he beats the odds and survives himself.
Rory in
Doctor Who, “The Wedding of River Song”
Despite the fact that the device allowing
him to remember seeing the Silence is causing him horrible pain, Rory still
manages to hold the aliens off while Amy, River, and the Doctor make a run for
it. He’d probably have died (again) if Amy didn’t come back at the last moment,
to gun down the leftovers.
Kimahri in
Final Fantasy X
Near the end of Final Fantasy X, The Yuna
and her guardians are faced with the threat of fighting an even more powerful
Seymour (her ex-husband. It’s complicated). To protect everyone, Kimahri tells
the gang to run for it while he holds Seymour
off. He’d have died for his noble deed too, if everyone didn’t wind up coming
back to fight with him.
Daniel in
Stargate SG1
In the season two premiere, Daniel
Jackson takes a nasty wound and assumes that’s it for him. So to protect the
rest of the crew, he offers to watch everyone’s back while they escape. When
his ship doesn’t blow up after all, he crawls into a sarcophagus which heals
him completely and escapes with his life.
Tracy in Heroes
At a certain point in the show (past the
point where most people were still watching), Tracy gets herself and nephew Micah in too
deep with the government. As they’re being chased and threatened, Tracy tells Micah to run
for it while she holds them off. He does so reluctantly as Tracy freezes the entire room including
herself, only to be shattered by agent Danko. You’d think she’d die, but since Heroes always had a problem with killing
people off for good, she later reforms from a puddle of water.
Gunn in Angel
When the Beast pays a visit to Wolfram
& Hart, everyone dies and becomes a zombie — except the Angel gang, of
course. But when things get hectic, Gunn tells everyone that he’ll slow the
zombies down while they make a run for it. Despite how poorly that goes for
most people in that situation, he survives unscathed.
Jim Raynor
& Fenix in Starcraft
After Tassadar kills the Overmind on the
Protoss home world of Aiur, the Zerg rampage across the surface, killing
relentlessly. The Protoss know they have to flee through the last warp gate —
but they also know the Zerg would overrun the portal too if someone doesn’t stay
behind to hold them off. That’s when Jim Raynor and Praetor Fenix offer to hold
the Zerg off so everyone can escape. At first everyone thinks they’re dead, but
they show up a little later and surprise everyone.
Wolverine in
the X-Men Comics
The X-Men have a bevy of powers, but the
Sentinels force even the likes of Wolverine into an “I’ll hold them
off”-type situation. Granted, Gambit didn’t ask to be protected, and he even
comes back to help Wolverine out after a while.
Iroh in
Avatar: The Last Airbender
In the season two finale, Iroh breaks out
of his restraints and fights off the Dai Li, Zuko, and Azula single-handedly,
so that Katara and Aang can escape.
Tyrande in
Warcraft III
During Warcraft III: The Frozen Throne, a massive wave of the undead is
chasing the Night Elf host across the Silverpine forest. Since Tyrande knows they’ll
eventually be caught if all they do is run, she stays behind on a bridge to
hold off the advancing Scourge forces. Causing the bridge to collapse with her
magic, she plummets to her presumed death and gets abandoned by her fellows.
It’s only thanks to Illidan, the man she was hunting, that she survives.
