Tesla and SpaceX CEO Elon Musk added yet another wearying episode to our multi-month-long Musk news cycle this week by smoking weed on camera with podcast host Joe Rogan, sending Tesla’s stock tumbling and triggering yet more speculation about his capacity to serve as CEO. But the episode may have bigger ramifications over at SpaceX, which is a federal contractor and privy to classified information like the details of government satellites.
Initial reports suggested that the Air Force, which uses SpaceX technology for launches, had launched an official investigation. But according to a report in the Verge, the Air Force actually has no idea what to do about Musk toking up and is still looking for an “appropriate process to handle the situation.”
However, an Air Force official tells The Verge that those reports are premature and that the military hasn’t figured out what it’s going to do.
“It’s inaccurate that there is an investigation. We’ll need time to determine the facts and the appropriate process to handle the situation,” an Air Force spokesperson told The Verge.
No worries, Air Force. I know there’s a lot riding on this, so I’ll tell you exactly how to manage this situation: Just relax and enjoy the ride. Dim the lights, order something cheap and greasy on Seamless, and put on Pink Floyd’s The Wall, or maybe Sigur Rós. If the cops show up, do not let Musk answer the door. And no matter how much he begs, don’t let him fly any jets (or tweet) until morning. Problem solved.