Flash Future Kung-Fu might be the most confusing Hong Kong science fiction movie ever made. But it's also totally awesome. Watch as our kick-boxing hero, Killer, takes on two nearly naked neo-Nazis, and then fights an army of sexy robots.
I love how oiled down the neo-Nazis are. And then the sexy robots are nearly naked too, except for their headgear.
Flash Future Kung-Fu, made in 1984 by renowned Hong Kong director Kirk Wong, is set in a vaguely Blade Runner-influenced future dystopia, where neo-Nazis team up with cyborgs to brainwash people, while their girlfriends screw people to death. Even that description makes the whole thing sound too coherent, however. It's hard to give a flavor of just how weird this movie is with only one clip, so I'm glad that someone's put four clips up on YouTube. (The clips are in Chinese with no subtitles, unlike my DVD copy which is horribly badly dubbed — but there's almost no dialogue for long stretches in this film, so it doesn't really matter.
When the neo-Nazis aren't brainwashing people and creating armies of robots, they're hanging out in their weirdly decadent club, the X-Club, which looks like a video game arcade where women dressed in tutus drown each other in vats of chemicals. (In one scene in the video game arcade, there's a naked woman in the background, but she never comes into shot and you only glimpse her from time to time. It's the only real nudity in the film, I think.)
Part of what makes this movie so bizarre is that there are long stretches where you literally cannot tell what's supposed to be happening. People just wander around acting sexy or violent, or staring at each other in the light of video game machines. At one point, the main sexy evil chick sniffs a gas mask for like five minutes, and then she goes and screws a guy to death.
Here's a representative scene of the neo-Nazis partying:
You can tell it's a dystopian future because there's an awesome futuristic car:
And then in the end, the main sexy chick (who you saw stabbing Killer's master in the neck with an axe in the first clip) gets on the video phone to Killer and tells him, "I killed your master, sucker." (At least, that's what she says in the English dub.) Killer barely has time to absorb this information, before the leader of the neo-Nazis arrives on an ATV bike thingy, and hands Killer a pair of boxing gloves. It suddenly transpires that Killer and the neo-Nazi leader are standing right next to a huge boxing ring, and nobody noticed. So they kick box! The end. Oh, and the sexy evil chick hangs herself with a computer cord.