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TSA Says Security Lines Will Be Totally Fucked Indefinitely

Image: Getty
Image: Getty

Surprise, motherfuckers! Your summer travel plans are about to get all kinds of messed up. Ha ha, wait, that’s not a surprise.


On Wednesday, Peter V. Neffenger, the head of the Transportation Security Administration, appeared before the House Homeland Security Committee in an attempt to explain why the country has suddenly been plagued with even longer airport lines than normal. Perhaps unsurprisingly, he proceeded to take a sledgehammer to the dreams of millions of Americans with summer travel plans, the New York Times reports.

Travelers will likely continue to slog through long wait times, he said, because the agency is anticipating a surge in summer travel. Those passengers in Chicago are no doubt thrilled right now.


“We are at a lower staffing level than we need to be to address peak demand,” Neffenger told Congress, according to the New York Times. This comes despite the fact that Congress has given the agency $34 million in funding, which will help hire an additional 768 screeners.

Members of Congress weren’t pleased with the TSA’s tepid explanations. “This is not a new rodeo,” committee chairman Michael McCaul said. “Why didn’t we see this coming?” Great question, Mike!

The TSA has had a rough couple of weeks. It recently fired its head of security for incompetence, and it was taken to task by the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey, which is not known for being too great itself. And let’s not forget how TSA blamed passengers for its problems.

It’s cool, guys. Just go back to your Donald Trump rallies while the rest of us wait in line for the rest of time.


[The New York Times]


Sophie is a former news editor at Gizmodo.

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Seriously. Fuck these fucking fucks. I also don’t necessarily believe that it’s a matter of being short staffed: my last flight out of Newark featured a 90 minute security line because they had ONE person checking ID.

Three others standing around playing with their dicks, watching the line, and laughing at passengers saying funny things like “I’m going to miss my flight” or (and this is 100% true) “My mother’s remains are on that flight, I can NOT miss it!”.

Go figure, after waiting 90 minutes and getting to the front of the fucking line, they finally opened a second line. So no, I don’t think it’s a staffing issue, I don’t think it’s a money issue, I think it’s a completely incompetently run group (governmental agency I should color me not surprised). Using the MVC (formerly DMV) as an example, I hope they DO privatize. At least by me the MVC experience has gotten nothing but better. Dramatically so, I might add. Shorter, more plentiful, faster moving lines etc...and while the people working there aren’t the friendliest in the world, I don’t really NEED friendly, I just need to get my shit done and continue with life.