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Microsoft Applies For the Patent on Beating Your Phone Into Silent Submission

There are plenty of high-tech phone features to yearn for, but Microsoft is applying for the patent on one so simple, primitive, and awesome you’ll be amazed you didn’t think of it yourself: the ability to smack your phone and have it shut up. It’s that simple, the phone makes a noise, you hit it,…

Here’s What Happens When You Accidentally Drop a GoPro From 12,500 Feet

Warning: If you’re epileptic, you might want to pass on this video. Everybody knows that GoPros are tough little suckers, but this one also seems to have had a little luck on its side. After falling 12,500 feet it not only survived completely unscathed, but also managed to capture its clumsy, skydiving owner’s landing. The…

Why Every Single Gadget Unboxing Is Weird, Creepy and Maybe Even Pervy

Think of this comic strip as a warning for everybody with a YouTube account who’s going to get an iPhone 5 and record a video of them unboxing it. Don’t do it. It’s weird. It’s silly. It’s not a thing anymore. And it might be even a little pervy. I’ll admit it, I was once…

Here Are the Blueprints for the iPhone 5

Attention case-makers, accessory-builders and generally curious minds: the iPhone 5 blueprints have been made available to those with an Apple dev account. And, even though Joel Johnson no longer has a dev account, he somehow managed to procure the prints. Thanks, Uncle Joel! [H/T @joeljohnson]

The Stoner Channels: Hard-Headed Numbers, Soft-Headed Pundits, and Rooftop Concerts—Oh My!

Government Audit Finds America’s War on Drugs Leads to Overcrowded Prisons The Government Accountability Office (GAO) acts as the Federal government’s bookkeepers, ensuring that the various functions of the US government are carried out efficiently while providing accountability for these programs to the American people. And it’s a good thing they do—just look at these…

Twitter Reacts to the Great Williamsburg Internet Outage of 2012

Confession: The majority of Gizmodo staff lives in Williamsburg, so we count ourselves in this mass of angry “hipsters.” But here’s the deal: The Internet went down in Williamsbug/Greenpoint (Brooklyn) today at approximately 3:54PM (EST). And, seven hours later, at 10:56PM (EST), word on the street (by which I mean Twitter) is that it is…

“Undergraduate” Shelves Are Sophisticated Storage Inspired by Student Dorms

Designer Andy Martin‘s gorgeous glossed shelves may look sophisticated, but their art actually just dressed-up versions of the stacked brick block shelving he and his peers used to assemble in their college dorms. “When I was a student, in Sydney, in campus accommodation with three other students we built brick shelves everywhere, they ended up…

This Week’s Top Web Comedy Video: The New Guy on New Girl with Zooey Deschanel

When you’ve got yourself a TV show—any TV show—you’ve got to have a way to spice it up. Some tricks work for drama, some for comedy, some for local news, but there’s only one ace-in-the-hole that works for anything and everything from teen-age prime-time soap opera to public access freak show: adding Regis Philbin. The…

Get a free domain name and web hosting for one year, from Google. Time to start that small business! [PC World]

Did Google Really Stop Acer From Making a Non-Android Phone? (Update: Yes)

Acer was planning on launching a low-end phone in China running Aliyun OS, a Linux based operating system that’s only relevant to us because it wasn’t Android. The phone was meant to be cheap and affordable and was targeted for China. But that phone is no more. Why? Because Google killed it. What? It’s an…

Watch NASA Beautifully Remember Neil Armstrong

Neil Armstrong. The first man on the moon. American hero. American legend. Buried at sea, this is how NASA remembers him. Watch it yourself and see how he touched everybody’s life and became the ultimate American. [NASA] https://gizmodo.com/sadly-you-will-not-be-able-to-visit-neil-armstrongs-gr-5941838

I Applied to Grey Poupon’s Members-Only Facebook Page… and Was Denied (UPDATED)

Grey Poupon, widely known to be the condiment aisle’s fanciest dijon mustard, isn’t just snooty its advertisements. The brand’s Facebook page actually screens Facebook profiles before accepting friends into its “members only” social circle of fancy fans. The Society of Good Taste (as they call themselves)is a “discerning Facebook page dedicated to the spread of…

Amazon Is Going to Start Charging Sales Tax (in California)

Californians. Dudes. Dudettes. The gig is up, folks. Starting midnight, Amazon customers in the Golden State of California will have to start paying tax on purchases made on Amazon and “other large internet retailers”. Go click crazy now while you can! Amazon currently charges tax in seven states right now (Kansas, Kentucky, New York, North…

Every Making Of Indiana Jones Documentary: These Belong in a Museum

Everyone loves Indiana Jones. That’s just science. But you’ve also probably seen all of them a hundred dozen times. You could go through and watch all of the Young Indiana Jones Chronicles on Netflix (actually, yeah, do that too). Or you could take a night and watch all of these wonderful documentaries about how the…

Russian post-apocalyptic phenomenon Metro 2033 could become a movie at last

Dmitry Glukhovsky’s novel Metro 2033 has become a hit video game and spawned a 20-book series, with offshoots coming in other countries. And now, at last, it’s going to be a Hollywood movie as well. Heat Vision is reporting that Mark Johnson, a producer who gave us the Narnia movies and Galaxy Quest, is making…

Rumor: Man of Steel could feature the most brutal superhero beatdown ever filmed

New rumors circulating about the new Superman movie Man of Steel include a massive, vicious fight for Clark Kent — only it’s not with the villain you expect. Spoilers ahead… Superman reportedly gets his ass kicked not by General Zod, but by his sidekick, Faora. And apparently it’s three times worse than another famous superhero…

Zuckerberg Rambling About Nothing for 30 Minutes Earned Facebook $7 Billion

Do you want to know what power is? Power is going up on a stage, yammering about very little for half an hour, and boom, a few days later your company is worth nearly $7 BILLION more than it was a few days ago. On Tuesday, Zuck took the stage at geeky strokefest TechCrunch Disrupt.…

This huge anglerfish sculpture is wicked nightmare fuel

Behold the massive metal jaws of “Deep Sea Angler Fish,” a five-foot long sculpture assembled entirely from recycled objects like bicycle parts, shovels and knives. It’s modeled after one of the ocean deep’s most iconic bioluminescent organisms. This is the fearsome handiwork of sculptor Justin La Doux, and it’s one of the coolest pieces of…

Apple Says iCloud Isn’t Broken For Anybody Anymore

Recently some iClouders have been having trouble with the service’s email. The downtime made a bit of a mess for the roughly two million users it affected, but now Apple has apologized, and assured everyone that all the screwed up emails have made it through now. This is just the email sent to one affected…

Pusha T: The Morning, Featuring Raekwon, Common, 2 Chainz, CyHi Da Prynce, Kid Cudi, D’Banj

Yesterday Kanye West’s “Cruel Summer” Mixtape leaked. In the typical grandiose style of ‘ye, it’s packed with just about every artist who’s big in hip hop right now. The morning is one of the songs off the G.O.O.D. Music compilation, and it might be one of the first hip hop bangers to make a Mark…