As of this month, Marvel Comics belongs to the Walt Disney Corporation, which also owns the ABC television network. So when are we going to see some corporate synergy happening? Here're 10 Marvel comics we need to see on television.
You may remember that we have previously proven through the use of both science and good taste that Superhero + Television = Suck (See: Heroes, Smallville), but luckily, that doesn't mean that ABC won't be able to find some worthwhile potential programming amongst their corporate brethren's intellectual offspring; it just means that they'll have to dig a little deeper - and get a little more creative - to find the broadcast gold. Here are some of our picks to get them started:
The Bozz Chronicles
The Pitch: A suicidal alien turns detective in Victorian London. Think Sherlock Holmes if Sherlock was a manic-depressive extra-terrestrial and Watson was a hooker Eliza Doolittle before she met Henry Higgins.
We See... a period drama mix of House (Weekly mystery procedural, grumpy lead character) and Bones (mismatched couple with sexual tension, one of whom educates the other on society, solve murders) with a little bit of science fiction thrown in. Transplant the story to America, get John Goodman as the rotund title character and you're good to go.
Dakota North
The Pitch: An international jet-set detective/bodyguard with clients including the rich, famous and occasionally familial. Human Target, but female and with family issues.
We See... Stana Katic from Castle in the title role, for one thing. But while this character has started to show up more regularly in Marvel's superhero books over the last few years (Daredevil, especially), we'd happily see someone take her back to her quirky hardboiled update of the old fashion and romance comics in a weekly TV series.
Legion Of The Night
The Pitch: A team of former occult investigators get brought out of retirement and together as a team by forces beyond mortal ken.
We See... comedic gold. Dump the original comic's sense of dread and angst, and play up with team dynamics and sense that these guys may have passed their prime. It's Ghostbusters meets Warehouse 13 meets Men of a Certain Age but with more obscure prophecies promising the end of the world.
Longshot
The Pitch: An innocent alien slave (who just so happens to be supernaturally lucky, and be able to make anyone fall in love with him) escapes to Earth learns about humanity while being hunted down by his former owners.
We See... a show that matches the off-kilter sensibilities and charm of Ann Nocenti and Art Adams' original series before the character got pulled into the X-Men. Maybe something along the lines of The Fugitive as made by the people behind Pushing Daisies? All you need is some unknown-yet-beautiful new male lead to play the title character and someone to convince Mary Louise Parker that she was born to play love interest/mentor Ricochet Rita.
Machine Man
The Pitch: The 51st artificial intelligence created by man is the first one not to be driven insane by self-awareness... but that doesn't mean that he's ready to fulfill his destiny as the military's greatest weapon.
We See... a weekly espionage version of Kyle XY, with some of the philosophical themes of Caprica and other AI sci-fi. Jack Kirby's admittedly goofy 1970s creation was ahead of its time, and we'd like to see someone give it the attention, and treatment, it deserves.
Models, Inc.
The Pitch: By day: High fashion models! By night: Murder-investigating amateur detectives! It's Murder She Wrote meets Project Runway!
We See... the greatest, campest television series ever. Paul Tobin's update of Marvel's old romance characters from last year may not have made the splash it deserved in comics, but if ever there was a television series that needed to be made, it's this one. Come on, ABC. You can even launch it with a very special episode of Ugly Betty.
Power Pack
The Pitch: We're breaking our No Superheroes rule for this one, because ever since its creation, there's been a special place in our hearts for the four children in the Power family, each of whom has their own superpower...
We See... a great kids' show waiting to happen. Power Pack has always worked best as kids' wish-fulfillment, and the dynamic between the kids (and their parents, unknowing but supportive) is something that could easily translate to television. Give it to ABC Family, put some money behind the effects, and it should be a no-brainer.
SHIELD
The Pitch: Talking of no-brainers: It's the world's greatest spy organization, kicking ass and taking names in the battle against anything and everything threatening the safety of the free world. Oh, and they have flying cars, clones and special formulas that prevent them from having to age. Did we mention that part?
We See... an Alias that doesn't get caught up in subplot hell. A Mission: Impossible that occasionally veers into Fringe and Cloverfield territory when needs be. You don't even need to use Nick Fury - although you could certainly mention him a few times to remind everyone about the movies - because the rest of the SHIELD concept is easily strong enough to carry its own series.
Son of Satan
The Pitch: The world's foremost demonologist just so happens to be the son of the world's foremost demon.
We See... an amped-up Supernatural, where the family drama is much more intense. Not only is Daimon Hellstrom - Yes, Marvel's names were a little on the nose in the 1970s - the son of a demon calling himself Satan, but he's also got a sister who's following in Daddy's footsteps. Get White Collar's Matt Bomer for the lead and everyone'll be happy. Of course, you may have to change the name.
Star Brand
The Pitch: The most powerful force in existence is in the hands of a random loser from Pittsburgh, who just might use it to end the world.
We See... a way to do Heroes, but with only Peter, and a sluttier Peter with less morals and bad hair at that. It could be a limited run series, complete with flashforwards (Hey, that sounds like an idea for a television show...) to after the Black Event, where our main character accidentally nukes Pittsburgh and launches the chain of events that takes the world into another world war. After all, limited run + timeshifts worked pretty well for ABC with Lost...