Be Prepared For a Real-Life Jurassic Park Escape With Nerf's New Line of Dino Blasters

Illustration for article titled Be Prepared For a Real-Life Jurassic Park Escape With Nerf's New Line of Dino Blasters
Image: Hasbro Nerf

There’s a real simple formula for selling to kids: grab any toy imaginable, combine it with A-list dinosaurs, and you’ve got an instant hint. Nerf has finally done the math and thundering out this spring is its new DinoSquad line of dart and water blasters, which are just about the best honor an extinct species could ever hope for.

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Nerf DinoSquad Rex-Rampage Blaster

Leading the herd is the only motorized option in the new DinoSquad line: the Tyrannosaurus Rex-inspired Rex-Rampage Blaster. It gobbles up four AA batteries and spits out 10 darts at a time that can be quickly loaded using swappable magazines—although just one is included. For $40 the Rex-Rampage also includes 20 Nerf Elite darts, dart storage on the stock, and an integrated targeting scope, and it also finally adds credence to the theory that T.rex was a hunter, not just a scavenger.


Nerf DinoSquad Tricera-Blast Blaster

If you prefer your dart blasters with less of an appetite for batteries, the Triceratops-inspired DinoSquad Tricera-Blast blaster uses a manually primed hammer to fire one dart at a time. But instead of using swappable magazines, pressing the triceratops’ horn causes the dino blaster’s lower jaw to swing down, allowing three darts to be loaded at a time. For $20 it comes with 12 Nerf Elite darts with storage slots for all of them on the stock, and unlike the herbivore triceratops, which only craved plants, this blaster has a hunger for annoying roommates, family members, and pets.

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Nerf DinoSquad Stego-Smash Blaster

The most affordable entry in the new DinoSquad line is the Stegosaurus-inspired Stego-Smash blaster, featuring a single-shot design that’s loaded by stuffing a dart down what appears to be one of the thunder lizard’s nostrils? A handle on the back primes the $10 blaster’s firing mechanism, while four of the five included Nerf Elite darts can be stored on the front of the blaster’s grip.

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Nerf Super Soaker DinoSquad Dino-Soak Blaster

Despite Jurassic Park’s claims that the Dilophosaurus could spit debilitating poison at its prey, the real dinosaur was lacking those abilities. It’s a fact we’re happy to ignore because the $15 DinoSquad Dino-Soak blaster might be the best dino-to-blaster conversion in the entire line. Like Hollywood’s version of the dinosaur, this Dilophosaurus can blast targets with whatever you fill its tank with, so every pump of the handle can leave your friends feeling like Dennis Nedry, but without the fear of being eaten afterwards.

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DISCUSSION

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Chip Overclock®

I may be ancient almost beyond belief, but I can tell you that as a kid I would have thought these were lame. Nerf guns that look like dinosaurs? Better to make them look like plausible real guns and slap “Jurassic Park Security” stickers on the sides.