The Star Wars prequels aren’t known for having the most insightful dialogue, but one Chinese bootleg could turn that all around. In the words of our favorite Lord Vader: “Do not want!”
Last year, YouTuber GratefulDeadpool uploaded a dubbed Chinese bootleg of Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, based on a machine’s poorly translated English subtitles from the bootleg’s Mandarin. It’s said to have been made over a decade ago, but thanks to YouTube, Star Wars The Third Gathers: Backstroke of the West is now starting to make wider rounds...and for good reason. It’s basically the greatest thing on Earth. I know what I’m watching tonight. In full.
Seriously, nothing about that isn’t gloriousness defined. It actually makes some of the scenes make more sense than they did before! I’m joking, of course, but it at least makes them entertaining. And if you thought Yoda was already sometimes hard to understand, just imagine what he’s like after 3+ rounds of translation. Spoilers: It’s actually no worse than anyone else. Except for that part where he calls Padme an “intimate friend.” Creepy.
You can watch the entire dub on YouTube, at least before someone catches wind and it gets taken down.
[Dorkly]
Clarification: The video was reportedly first made in 2006, but was most recently put on YouTube in 2016.