The tale of the missing succubus drags on, Tamsin returns
(sort of), and Dyson and Hale are on the case in this week’s Lost Girl. It
seems there’s some double-crossery in the future, and surprise surprise, Vex is
involved.
We now know exactly where Bo is, even if the rest of the
gang doesn’t – she awakens on an old timey train flying through dimensions. The
train attendant (whom Bo suck-ubusses) is very concerned about disturbing a
mysterious “him.” Bo apparently needs her life essence to kick open the train’s
door and leap into the darkness. Which is ironic because Dyson spends the
entire episode trying to get on the
train to rescue her.
Back on Canada-Earth (an alien planet where roadside diners
still have functional pay phones), Dyson finds a feral girl at the site of his
truck crash with Tamsin. Luckily they don’t drag out the mystery of the girl –
wolfie puts it together immediately that it’s Tamsin reincarnated, a common
thing with Valkyries. Sadly they do drag out interminable scenes of Kenzi dealing
with the bratty girl, which was faintly amusing at best. Tween Tamsin quickly
becomes teen Tamsin, leading to some uncomfortable jailbait humor with Hale.
Definitely can’t wait to get real Tamsin back.
Does it seem like this recap is bouncing all over the place?
I think it’s because the episode was kind of a mess too. No real cohesive plot,
just a bunch of situations loosely connected. So, what’s up next? How about Vex
being tortured by the Una Mens? Kind of a cool scene, him all trussed and
scarred. The Una Mens’ “we are unfamiliar with your human customs” routine
could get old really quickly, but it could also be really creepy if played
right. The name “Una Mens” will never stop sounding silly.
Vex trades his life (I think? They tried to put a mask on
him and he seemed really afraid of that) for Bo, offering “the unaligned
succubus” to the Una Mens instead of info on the Morrigan’s location. Later we
see Vex stealing what I think was an old Chrysler Imperial (hard to tell from
two quick shots) and making a deal with Clio the nymph.
Who’s Clio the nymph? She was around briefly last episode at
George Takei’s snake party (and she’s played by Mia Kirshner, whom you may
recognize as the owner of the brothel in SyFy’s Defiance). This time she shows
up at the hair salon Dyson and Hale head to in their search for Endemian the
tracker, thinking his ex-wife Selene might know where he is. Clio instead sends
them to talk to Astrid with a note in Hindi (apparently Hale knows Hindi).
Normally at this point I’d write about the mythological backstory surrounding
Endemian and what kind of fae creature Astrid is, but Lost Girl doesn’t seem to
care about that stuff anymore. They just rattle off some gibberish that sounds
vaguely magical, and they never bother about the real-world mythology anyhow,
so screw it. I instead spent that time trying to figure out what year Chrysler Vex
was stealing.
Astrid gives Hale a dollop of love potion on his forehead
and says some stuff about “finding the courage to hunt.” She gives Dyson a kiss
in a bottle. They head off in search of “Eddy” (Endemian) while Hale lives out
the Monty Python’s Holy Grail Castle
Anthrax fantasy with a bunch of eager fae ladies, who thankfully put away their
claws. The scene gives us the episode’s best dialog:
“So in this fantasy of yours, were all the girls carrying
pokey thing?”
“No, there was just one pokey thing.”
Dyson tracks Eddy to Selene’s abode, where he finds a
painting of a nude Selene. Behind is a cleverly locked door which Dyson tears
open. It seems Selene has kept Eddy asleep and under her control for hundreds
of years. I’m not sure they even try to explain the mechanism of all this –
there was something about a kiss and then another kiss? So Dyson gives her the
fake kiss, then turns her face toward sleeping Eddy and says, “Now kiss him.”
Ah, a trace of the old Lost Girl, where things would get sexually transgressive
now and then!
But this scene was also really weird – although Selene is a
baddy, she never really threatens Dyson with any kind of violence (just enthusiastic
rough sex). So when he puts his hand around her throat, it felt like a step
over the line. When Eddy woke up, called her a harlot, then elbow smashed her
face, knocking her out, that felt way over the line. Wife beating played for
laughs, I guess.
Back at chateau Bo, Hale decides to have his little talk
with Kenzi about his true feelings for her. Within seconds they’re grinding
each other on the kitchen table. Hale realizes it’s just the potion Astrid gave
him, but he seems like he’s just going to roll with it until teen Tamsin
interrupts. Kenzi-Hale shippers must feel like Hale did as he fled the
apartment – that scene was such a tease for them.
To track Bo, Eddy needs Dyson to describe her. To really describe her. He finally does, saying
she has a beautiful heart that breaks whenever one of her friends is hurt. And
that’s the closest Lost Girl has come to explaining why everyone loves Bo so
much – because it’s a two-way street. She loves each of them just as much, and
goes to ridiculous lengths to help them. I’ll buy it.
Then it turns out Eddy is crappy tracker because he can’t
read the words on the magic fae vending machine. Clio the nymph shows up and
explains she’s been taking Eddy’s tracking gigs while he was asleep. She’s an
elemental who can control all four elements. Neat! They use the Wanderer tarot
card to board the death train…the one Bo jumped out of. And thus we get the
perfect metaphor for the first few episodes of this season: waiting for a
train.
I can’t forget about yet another side plot, Lauren’s refuge
at the diner as a clumsy girl named Amber with a seriously terrible wig. Now I
get that Lauren is intentionally making herself look plain because she’s a
fugitive, but yikes. Badly done bangs aside, Lauren’s boss (who does look
pretty cute in that flouncy skirt) sexually harasses her like crazy, calling
her sexy and asking her to stay for a drink. When Lauren refuses, she acts all
pissy and even makes Lauren apologize.
Lauren saves a random fae (again, not
even bothering to work out what they based him on) from choking while blonde
boss lady takes a cell phone video. They eventually bond over shots and deleting
the video, but the resulting hug seemed pretty platonic – not where boss lady
was hoping it would end up.
I want to finish up on a high note by pointing out the
episode’s title: “Sleeping Beauty School.” It’s not notable by itself, but it
means that finally, no more “fae” puns for episode titles. Rejoice!
