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Thief Hacked a Woman’s Bank Account to Steal One Penny to Buy Porn

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Hacking someone’s bank account isn’t easy, even if they have a shitty password taped to the dashboard of their car or something. But the payoff’s totally worth it: With the loot, you can afford things like extravagant fetish porn that costs a penny.

Someone who was apparently horny and very bad off financially hacked the bank account of a woman living in Buffalo Gorve, Illinois, and printed out checks with her name and account number, but an address located about 50 miles away. The woman noticed a stray purchase on her statement, so she called the business the fake check was made out to, and found out that it was a porn site and someone had made a purchase in her name. For one cent.

Obviously, we have a few questions here. What kind of pornographic website accepts payment in the form of a check? What kind of anything website—or anything anything—accepts payment in the form of a check? What kind of porn costs one cent? Is it quantifiably better than free porn? Was this a feeler purchase, or the beginnings of a spree of penny-sized porno check purchases? Is the ol’ penny check porno buy scam a real thing that actually happens?

If you are this nameless, apparently penniless, porno-loving hacker, please get in touch with us to address these questions. We offer anonymity and contacts who will help you with any of your future porn requirements. [WLS AM via Drudge]

Image credit: Lisa F. Young/Shutterstock/Febeleh

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