You Can Now Collar Your Kid To Save Them From Drowning

The smell of coconut sunblock is in the air, daiquiris are being consumed in record numbers, and dudes on the subway have all forgone their sleeves to show us their poorly groomed armpit hair. Summer is here!


Which means it’s time for a pool party.

Unfortunately, pool parties can lead to pool drownings. You could hire a hot lifeguard to watch over all your cherubic little angels, or you could buy the SEAL Swim Safe swim monitoring system. This setup has been used by YMCAs all over the country and is now being made available via Amazon for your watery backyard shenanigans.

The collar you wrap around your kid’s neck connects to a central hub that sounds an alarm if the collar is submerged under water. You can customize the alarm so it can sound when the collar is immediately submerged, or when its been submerged for 15 seconds, or as long as 45 seconds. Presumably that last one is for older kids, or the ones you’re training to be the next cop from Time Trax.

The whole “collar kids to protect them from drowning” thing seems incredibly weird and like a potential choking hazard, but the collar was super easy to remove and actually snapped right off when I hooked it on one arm and yanked with just one finger from the other. And a collar is way, way, way better than those nerdy little floaties the sad kid had to wear at the pool.

Senior Consumer Tech Editor. Trained her dog to do fist bumps. Once wrote for Lifetime. Tips encouraged via Secure Drop, Proton Mail, or DM for Signal.


Ari B

Or, I don’t know, maybe you could just watch your fucking kids? Lifeguards are not babysitters.