Steve Jobs and O.J. Simpson Sued For Aiming Missiles at Prisoner's Brain

A lawsuit has been filed against Steve Jobs and O.J. Simpson, with allegations of Apple hiring O.J. as a hitman, exhibiting prejudice toward political prisoners by slashing iPhone prices, and cloning Dolly the sheep in 1998. The plaintiff also claimed he is in danger of being radio-wave warped by O.J. for possessing old cards of the Hall of Fame wack job.

For those unaware, the man making these accusations is 30-year-old Jonathan Lee Riches, a prisoner in South Carolina. And while the accusations he's making obviously aren't real, the court filings are. This isn't the first time Riches has done this. His handwritten documents may look amateur, but they are written in fluent legalese and still have to be processed by the court.


Past efforts this summer included a $63,000,000,000 lawsuit against Michael Vick claiming he was an al Qaeda operative and a $42,000,000 lawsuit against Barry Bonds and Hank Aaron's bat with allegations of cracking the liberty bell and giving Sadaam Hussein mustard gas. If anything, Riches' knack for being timely might earn him a new comedic genre of his own....and the wrath of Real Steve Jobs. [Apple Insider]

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