Unedited: Gizmodo Wishes a Happy Birthday to Our Brian Barrett

Illustration for article titled Unedited: Gizmodo Wishes a Happy Birthday to Our Brian Barrett

Do you know our managing editor Brian Barrett? You should! He appeared in that TV commercial with Beyonce. You know the one. But he's also one of our best friends and a terrific guy to work with. And today is his birthday.


Brian is grappling with being 31, which is actually a very nice age, considering the average American male lives to be 75. So many years to go. But he's also infused with youthful zest and vigor that belie any number. Still, we gave him a gentle teasing on this day in our Campfire group chat.

Casey C. do you guys know what that kid in kazaam lokos like now?
Barrett this would mean more if I remembered what he looked like then
Sam B. casey owns kazaam on blu-ray
Sam B. hahahahahaha
calling someone old on their birthday is awesome
Barrett man, and this is an OLD birthday
Casey C. (soweeee)
Wagner at this point, aren;t they all?
Sam B. old and getting older
Barrett at least 30 is like, a big party
Sam B. if anything 31 should be better because now like
you're "a guy in his 30s"
instead of TURNING 30
Barrett that is in no way better
Sam B. yeah but you can at least own it
and be a 30-something
instead of brian who used to be in his 20s
now you can do 30-something stuff
like ___________________
and ______________________
Barrett mortgages
Sam B. yeah
Barrett homeowners insurance deductables
SPEAKING OF WHICH need to pay both of those
Sam B. comparing one kind of drywall to another kind
Wagner you were on TV a lot in your 20s
Barrett thanks buddy
Sam B. waking up in the middle of the night and thinking about drywall, and if you bought the wrong kind
even after all of that comparison shopping
and then thinking about 40
and what that means
40, ever looming
Barrett does one buy drywall?
Wagner when one has a mortgage, one does
Sam B. at least one better
unless one wants one's walls to crumble
on the other hand, you have a beautiful wife and home
Sam B. and a great job
and I'm going home alone tonight to heat up soup and cut hot dogs into it
and hope my cable is fast enough to stream game of thrones on HBO Go
and stare at the ceiling until consciousness spares me
and hope I dream once more of what it was like to be in high school
Wagner is this some kind of protest about adrian being out and there being no daily wagner
Sam B. ok back to [redacted] review peace fuckers
Kristen P. I'm tardy to the party but Happy Bday Brian!


Now, your turn! Wish Gizmodo Managing Editor Brian Barrett happy birthday, or you'll be banned.

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Dear Brian: Happy Birthday, and Many Happy Returns. Just FYI, I've got ties that are 31. Seriously.