Vampire Jeff Goldblum Seduced a Little Girl in a 90s Goosebumps CD-ROM Game

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He's been a cranky chaos theorist, an abusive godfather, and repelled an alien invasion to save the entire planet. But one role you probably don't know about? A creepy, tween-seducing vampire in a Steven Spielberg-helmed Goosebumps computer game. Yeah. Yeah.

The (thankfully) forgotten "Goosebumps: Escape From HorrorLand" also bizarrely starred Isabella Rossellini for some reason—were these actors all in a lot of debt in 1996?—and represents everything that was terrible about computer games in that era. Awful graphics. Cheesy dialogue. Ridiculous FMV. And, of course, Jeff Goldblum, wearing a vampire costume that looks like it cost about $45 to whip together, waltzing with a young girl against a CG backdrop (skip to 6:35 for the good stuff). Click him! Click him to save the day! Or just click close tab and forget this deranged moment in computer history ever existed, which is what I'm going to struggle to do for the rest of the day. [PopMatters via io9]