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Damn, Star Wars' New Anthology Book Really Did Dexter Jettster Like This

Good news, Star Wars fans: loveable diner owner Dexter Jettster is back! Bad news, Star Wars fans: he's really really sad!

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Image: Lucasfilm

Of all the intriguing tales in the new Return of the Jedi anniversary anthology From a Certain Point of View, one revolving around Attack of the Clonespremiere gourmet establishment proprietor Dexter Jettster was arguably the most intriguing to many when it was announced. What was Dexter up to during the original trilogy? It turns out the answer was being very sad.

In a new excerpt from Adam Lance Garcia’s “The Veteran,” one of the 40 tales in Return of the Jedi: From a Certain Point of View posted to today, we pick up with Dexter in the immediate wake of the battle of Endor, as the world of Coruscant learns of the second Death Star’s destruction. But it turns out that while the world around him rejoices in the hope of the Empire’s downfall, poor Dex has been having a generally miserable time after the prequels. He misses his dear friend Obi-Wan Kenobi (awww), he blames his own intelligence about the Kaminoan saberdart for starting the Clone War and upending the galaxy (awww), but perhaps the sharpest of knives in our chest?

Dex wasn’t sure whether the warrior had died on the front or during the Purge, though he prayed it was the former. He couldn’t bear the thought of his friend being gunned down by his own men. Dex could never forget how the Jedi Temple blazed in the night, how the smoke billowed days after the fires were quenched, how the air tasted of ash, and how soot covered his diner for weeks, no matter how frequently he and Wanda cleaned.

Nearly a thousand years of peace, reduced to dust.

“It’ll be fine, honey, you’ll see,” Wanda had said, reminding him that droids rarely saw beyond their programming.

She broke down three years later.

He lost the diner soon after.

They took his diner! They took his waitress droid! They took everything from Dexter Jettster!


This isn’t the first time Star Wars novels have taken a jokey prequels character and then given them a crushingly tragic life during the reign of the Empire, because that’s apparently a thing that can have regular occurrence in the Star Wars galaxy. Dexter’s situation isn’t quite “depressed clown contemplating your role in lending political power to a secret Sith Lord” like Jar Jar’s ended up being, because what is. But still. Poor guy. What’s a Star Wars prequel character gotta do to get a break in the galaxy far, far away?


You too can read about just how sad Dexter Jettster is when Return of the Jedi: From a Certain Point of View releases on August 29.


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