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The Burrito Pop Will Ensure You’re Only a Mess on the Inside

When done properly, eating a burrito should be a hopelessly messy experience, with a paper wrapper doing nothing to contain its contents’ endless drippings. But that messiness limits when and where you can eat a burrito (if you care about how you look, that is), which is why a device called the Burrito Pop exists. It’s not quite a burrito thermos, or a burrito condom, or a burrito elevator, but all of the above at the same time.

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If you’ve ever enjoyed a Push Pop—those lollipops in a tube that are kind of like eating an oversized ChapStick—then you already have a solid idea of what the Burrito Pop is all about. It’s a large plastic tube, thicker than most thermoses, that’s big enough to accommodate even giant-sized burritos. Once inserted, the burrito rests on a floor that slowly raises when the bottom of the tube is twisted, again, similar to how you extract lip balm from a ChapStick. This allows you to eat the burrito while it’s still inside the tube, ensuring that any and all drippings are safely contained inside the Burrito Pop, instead of running all over your hands or ending up on your outfit, particularly nice work clothes, which maybe we might all have to wear again one day.

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Invented by Madelin Woods after one day discovering her coffee mug was a handy way to contain a burrito’s mess while she consumed it, the Burrito Pop is dishwasher safe, microwaveable, and is also a useful way to transport a burrito without it getting smooshed inside a lunch bag—kind of like burrito armor.

But despite all of the apparent benefits it offers, the invention still raises one simple question: Why? Burritos are messy, sure, but it’s not like you’re biting into a lit stick of dynamite that could go off at any minute. Grab a bunch of napkins, eat at a table, or lean over when taking a bite; there are a myriad of simple and free solutions to staying clean while eating a burrito, even if you’re taking the ultimate risk and eating one in a moving car.

That being said, if you eat burritos frequently, and are committed to carrying around a giant plastic tube so that you’re always prepared for when you stumble across a food truck, the Burrito Pop is currently accepting preorders through pledges on Kickstarter. The retail price is expected to be around $50 eventually, which sounds like a lot given napkins are usually free, but you can snag one now for just $28 with delivery expected as soon as December. The usual crowdfunding cautions still apply here, but even moreso in 2020, with supply chains and manufacturing around the world thrown into chaos. If you’re backing a crowdfunded product this year, an abundance of patience is recommended and you should take estimated delivery dates with a few grains of salt.

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DISCUSSION

It also substitutes as a fleshlight.